Following the footsteps of a rag doll dance…

December 1, 2025December 1, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Not all cultural references are directly transferable some are “time of life” and others are “time of man” related. I personally view myself as being on the conservative side in that outwardly I am not outlandish. It always used to amuse me how the “goths” had less of an idea of the shadows than I did.

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But Siouxsie et al. were definitely a part to the soundtrack of my life.

In the “A Discovery of Witches” TV series the notion of the main protagonist being spellbound has come to the fore. In which her parents cast a spell which both hid and prevented the usage of her powers. She was literally bound by spell or spell bound. The narrative suggests that this practice was usually reserved for insane witches and that it was a harsh thing to do, to prevent the person from living to their full potential, to inhibit and otherwise hinder them. The back story is that the “creatures” are forced to hide from the discriminatory humans and their notions of normality. Humans are depicted as prejudiced. The story also has “time-walker” as a top echelon witchcraft skill. A lot of the plot revolves around “powers” of a magical and special kind. Power ever being the motivator for political intrigue, shenanigan and skullduggery. Somehow Diana is able to summon an old text which may or may not hold the secret(s).

In physics a lot of stock is made upon observables and making an observation. If one in any way makes an observation one changes the system. For example if one “observes” a photon using a detector that photon changes the energy state of an electron. The photon ceases to be. The energy has been transformed from one thing to another. At a very local and very tiny level every act of observation changes the system. Science rhetoric is less explicit as to the nature of interpretation and subsequent assimilation caused by the observation, the act of observation. One could say that the observation of a “handful” of particles in a science experiment can have a truly dramatic and wide ranging impact because of interpretation and assimilation to or with a previously held thought form or model. I might infer that a photon is the witness to an act of proton transfer. My observation hints at a physical process. Any observation changes the system and it cannot be undone. If I talk about it down the pub that handful of photons triggers synapses and a train of thought heads off on whichever trajectories.

I have always had a few problems with the notion of time travel because of observation. It is impossible to travel back in time without altering its forward propagation. Although pleasant as an artistic and entertaining notion it is philosophically tricky. {Ok there may be some time reversal events at sub atomic levels that I am unaware of but these may be mathematical legerdemain}. In terms of karma time travel is also problematic.

In my mind it raises an interesting thought line. “Does reminiscence alter the past or merely our recollection and narrative assimilation thereof?” We do not travel back in time to the acts of perception but how we retell what we “remember” does change our futures because our basis for world interpretation has altered if only slightly.

If for example you held a view that I was a complete bastard and you hated my guts, then any future interaction would be coloured by this framing. If on reminiscing you decided I was only a partial bastard then you have already changed the future. Your change of mind changes the future(s).

Time-walking may be seen as a reinterpretation of events previously observed. Bearing in mind that the apparatus of observation must of course be error prone and never 100% accurate. Not all instruments are sensitive nor well calibrated. We do not actually go back in “physical” time rather review our mental registers of how we have constructed the time evolving narratives. We could re-consider, re-view and possibly re-perceive. Much like an astronomer may apply correction factors to space telescope raw data. There is some “algorithm” which enables (perhaps) a more reliable assimilation. We may refuse to apply said algorithm because we are stuck in our ways and like to cling to old perceptions, prejudices and world views.

The quantum mechanics of a 75kg lump of wet proteins and fats going backwards {or forwards} in time do not seem plausible. Perception and “mind” however are clearly much less physically tangible. In a sense these may be able to travel along what might be called time-registers. In the absence of matter time has no meaning. In a sense time as it is measured is a property of matter (vibration or time to travel between spatial coordinates). How we currently measure time is by the observation of photons in a fancy physics rig.

To extrapolate wildly by measuring time we are changing our futures.

Expansion of Consciousness and Letting Go

November 15, 2025November 15, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Before I get into this I will take a little diversion. It is to do with karmic “debt” which is another way of simply saying imbalance. If you take more than you give that is unbalanced and ultimately unsustainable. If we “wrong” someone we may feel guilty especially if we are socially caught in so doing, found out, reported to teacher. We may be socially required to say “sorry” even if we do not mean it. It does not change the “wrong” one iota. It is the sort of thing our mothers might require of us if we stole our sister’s Maltesers. It is a social “peace” keeping. It does not change the karma one tiny bit. Until such time we feel it in our hearts to be wrong, we will continue to accrue karmic debt from similar acts. Were the scales to fall from our eyes one fine day we might want to change our ways. We might re-orient our behaviour towards our fellow human beings, try to stop being selfish bellends and do some nice self-less stuff for a change. We would not do this for “show” or PR. Karma does not give a toss about PR. We can never undo a wrong we have meted out to someone nor can we “make it up to them”. What we can do is ensure that we do not inflict that behaviour on others.

Say for example you were to slag me off. You could never undo that. What you could do is make a general effort not to repeat this behaviour, not to inflict it on others. You could strive to be generally more positive and less derogatory. You could balance out your unpleasantness by being more pleasant generally. In so doing you would start to balance your books with the universe. There is no requirement to do anything in respect of me, rather a more general debt to the universe. I personally am unlikely to feel aggrieved or owed. So to try to make it up to me would be silly and probably disingenuous.

Here we have an example of a consciousness expanded away from the petty and personal to the wider and universal. At the moment it seems Trump takes everything personally and vindictively so. His focus is centered on him and does not have a wider universal view. It is all about his personality and his sense of self. He feels hard done by a lot of the time and is prone to playing angry victim.

This sense of victimhood is shared by vast tracts of humanity; they bemoan that life is unfair and complain that things are not as they should be. They imagine life a burden forced upon them. They try to have life on their own terms. If they don’t like how they look they will pay a plastic surgeon to surgically disfigure them. Their consciousness is not expanded beyond their perception of how the meat looks. They are fixated on something arguably silly.

In the blue books opus the Tibetan discusses initiation as a sequential expansion of consciousness, here diagrammatically represented.

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In the diagram, the scale is reconfigured at the end of each open cone. The diameters represent the breadth of consciousness and width of inclusiveness. Each successive cone is an order of magnitude increase in breadth of consciousness. The scale is perhaps logarithmic.

According to the text the consciousness of a fifth degree initiate differs very markedly from your normal common or garden human. What might concern them is not the same as the house home heart wallet and genitals of normal people. Normal people worry about a host of mundane things which in the wider evolutionary scheme do not matter very much. Your much sought after promotion in job is of no consequence in terms of your spiritual evolution.

If you think of a snake as it grows and evolves it has a tendency to shed its skin so that it, no longer constrained, can grow. A similar view can be had here. As a person evolves the ways and thought patterns of the old life must be shed. Let go of. So that a newer nascent consciousness can expand unburdened by the habits {bad} of the past. The fresh new skin does not need the scaly old ways to constrain it. This letting go can mean relationships which drag you down or they can simply need recalibrating. Old habits die hard and these are the detritus that needs letting go of.

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Being obsessed with little trite details can prevent the expansion of consciousness. One needs to move from the petty and personal to more universal and joined up. To recognise there is but one life to which we all pertain.

To the would be initiate expansion of consciousness and spiritual evolution are the only goals of merit. They seek to rise above the mundane and not remain trapped in the mire which is often petty and of a deeply personal nature.

Letting go is vital in order to enable expansion of consciousness. Mental skin, rigid self-image must be shed again and again.

You cannot expand your consciousness by keeping the same view of the world you currently have. It acts as barrier to evolution, a ghetto wall which keeps you constrained.

Letting go is a truly vital component to the expansion of consciousness. Letting go vivifies.

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Not Letting Go – Unresolved

November 13, 2025November 13, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Today the news said that the GDP growth for the UK was 0.1% . The wife asked how I thought they calculated that. I said that there was a whole host of metrics but that I doubted the measurements were accurate to the 0.1% level. In my mind the error bars on GDP calculation must be far bigger than plus or minus 0.1% so that all the hoo-ha concerning a 0.3% rise {for example} is simply bollocks; a headline made by those who do not understand data. The more you think about it the more bollocks it becomes. The reported number needs realistic error bars and some measure of statistical confidence. The headline figures are misleading.

That is my opinion and I offer it up.

This morning I had yet another dream about a massive mess {karmic} made by people I was previously acquainted with mostly of English nationality. “Yawn, not again, not still” was my mental response. It led me to thinking about national archetype. People who embody and display behaviour archetypal for the nation to which they pertain. I have already noted the political shenanigans associated with perfidious Albion and that never ending petty bickering one upmanship can be seen as archetypical. Such archetypical behaviour does by extrapolation feed into national karma.

What you do effects the karma of the nation in which you live. You are sharing your shitty behaviour with others, what you do impacts upon them.

My social interactions historically could be seen {in this life} to have largely been with the English {UK} intelligentsia. Specifically that part of the intelligentsia which pertained to science and perhaps a lesser extent technology. I had little to do directly with the overtly political classes.

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“The intelligentsia is a status class composed of the university-educated people of a society who engage in the complex mental labours by which they critique, shape, and lead in the politics, policies, and culture of their society; as such, the intelligentsia consists of scholars, academics, teachers, journalists, and literary writers. Conceptually, the intelligentsia status class arose in the late 18th century, during the Partitions of Poland (1772–1795). Etymologically, the 19th-century Polish intellectual Bronisław Trentowski coined the term inteligencja (intellectuals) to identify and describe the university-educated and professionally active social stratum of the patriotic bourgeoisie; men and women whose intellectualism would provide moral and political leadership to Poland in opposing the cultural hegemony of the Russian Empire.”

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The problem of “not letting go” pervades social psychology. People bear grudges, are envious, hateful, vengeful, clingy. They may hang on to some illusion, some unmet ideal. They can be obsessed about how things are supposed to be, how they should be and how they ought to be. They can conspire with each other and mutually reinforce an unwillingness to let go. Even if some notion or idea is well past its sell by date, they cling. Not letting go can cause anxiety, misery and inertia.

The antidote to “not letting go”, sometimes painful, is reality.

“Not letting go” can be a phenomenon of group mind. The most trite example of this is 1966 and the soccer world cup {FFS}. People can imagine themselves patrician benefactors instead of brutal colonialists. To admit that India is/was not British {old boy} was a hard pill to swallow.

One of the primary glues in group mind which prevents letting go and moving on is secrecy. Shared secrets are perhaps the singular most psychologically binding pact between individuals. Secrets are rarely seen as the knot and shackles which they actually are. Strange things grow in the darkness. Offered to the light of day pustules can cease to fester and may even heal.

That which you keep secret has a power over you unlike any other things. Your secrets whisper to you in a conspiratory tone, they gnaw at your fear and stoke your near sexual salacious enjoyment. They skew sense of proportion. In very many cases a secret dragged out into the light of a dawning sun simply evaporates on a cloud of “no big deal”. No drama.

If you share a secret with another then you are bound and shackled to them. The strength of the chains relates to the nature of secret.

The thing is that unresolved problems are thermodynamic in the sense that the do not spontaneously self-resolve by magic. Mess does not clean itself up. There is no saviour or fairy godmother to sort your crap out for you.

I am sorry if that seems brutally unfair…

One of things people have difficulty letting go of is their personal narrative of events and of they themselves. If they have cast themselves as knight in shining armour, it can be hard to accept that they have behaved like a shitty little nematode. People invest very heavily in the stories they tell themselves and tell others. It can be very liberating to let go of a lie you have been propagating.

Until you have the wisdom gained from personal experience, letting go of an increasingly dubious story can be a terrifying notion. It is only when the massive boulder of propping up a lie has been let go of that you feel lighter and may be able to soar. A story, a narrative can be like the boulder of Sisyphus.

Many, in fear of letting go, keep pushing that same old shit up the hill day after day.

In many cases shared secrets are like a mutual ball and chain that keep you tightly claustrophobically incestuously bound together. There is nothing quite like a secret to stoke the fear of letting go. They can be hellish.

This is an opinion and I offer it up.

The Lotus Eaters and a Logical If

October 27, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

As the nights draw in and the temperature drops the occurrence of wildlife in the garden goes up, becomes more frequent. Already the badger is looking for roots, soon we may get deer grazing. For sure the “lotus eaters” aka Coypu or Nutria will return. There was evidence of an attempted perimeter breach overnight. The charge on the battery driving the electric fence has dropped. I had a shock off it yesterday, a tickle. Today I have replaced the battery. This means if any of the Coypu family come to snack on our tasty lotuses Thor may release a lightning bolt to discourage. Since we have installed the electric fence by the river our display of lotuses has flourished. This year was magnificent.

Om mane padme hum

If we take dream content as evidence and consider visions as non hallucinatory then we might conclude that I have had at least four and probably five lives in a priestly or monk like Buddhist incarnation. It is therefore not too much of a stretch to suggest that the term bodhisattva might apply to me, I can be considered as someone seeking liberation. In one of these “visions” I was told that this is my very last incarnation, a suggestion which is internally consistent with the aforementioned logical if.

This may not sit entirely easily in juxtaposition with a brief career as a pukka scientist. It might seem odd to the class professorial. To me there is no jarring.

We then come upon the Garry Glitter question, “to whose gang do I belong?”

Am I Toltec?

Am I Buddhist?

Am I boffinacious?

One could perhaps draw a Venn diagram, if one could be arsed.

I am unlikely to fall into worship of anti-scientific superstitious conspiracy theories. I am not science-phobic. Nor do I believe in the whole saviour fallacy. Nobody died to save you; it is up to you. Confessing your sins will not remove karmic debt even if you pay the pope a cool million quid. You cannot bribe karma.

To follow on from the logical if. There is an addendum.

If you have treated a bodhisattva badly then that is karmically “bad” for you.

We then get quickly into splitting karmic hairs about degree of bodhisattva and extent of transgression.

The basic rule of thumb is try not to be an arrogant bell end to anyone. It does not need to be any more complicated than this. It is not a bad mantram.

“Remember to try not to be an arrogant bell end…”

Ian – P&L – Didn’t Ask – Avocat – Big Mistake – Dream 25-09-2025

September 25, 2025September 25, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Here is this morning’s dream. It is perhaps the most out-of-the-blue I have had considering the subject matter. It was from between 6:15 and 8 AM. I had thought that the present “cluster” of dreams was over and that I would not go back to sleep.

I am sat in a lounge like living area of my house. Which differs from the current real world one. Ian my flatmate from the early eighties is with me. He has come for refuge from the hurly burly, the stresses and strains. We are chatting and I pour him a glass of wine. He says that “they” are probably going to close his university department, meaning the “senior” management. It has been an uphill battle and student recruitment is down.

I offer to look at the P&L accounts for his department to see if there is anything he has missed. I explain to him that I was a company director. He hands them over and I do a thorough look. Two of the three sub-courses are loss making. I don’t see an obvious way to turn it around into profit, but losses can be reduced. I see an alternate revenue stream. Which we discuss. We have a brief siesta.

To get some fresh air we go out into the garden. It starts by looking like here. Then we get on a quad bike to explore more widely. He sits pillion and we race about having some fun. We come to an area of the garden. There is a paved path going from the main road across the/my property to a fenced off industrial quasi-governmental compound with low rise multi-storey buildings. There is a security fence with gate and pass code entry. This morning the path was not there. They have built it while we were asleep.

When the wife comes back from the supermarket she too will be unimpressed.

I drive up along the path to the security gate. Ian and I dismount. I press the buzzer on the gate and a workman in dark blue overalls appears. I ask why they thought it was a good idea to build the path across my land without permission or legal right of way. He does not understand English. So I repeat in French and say that I am about to call my avocat-attorney on the ‘phone. He needs to get me someone senior to talk to.

He goes and come back with a young man in his thirties-forties. He is wearing jacket and jeans. I ask him why he thought it was a good idea and otherwise OK to build on my land without asking and why they infringed property trespass. I will sue for trespass. He is placatory and acts as it does not matter, bof. I am unimpressed to understate.

I proceed in French to demand that he gets the company head because I will be taking the lot of them to court. I will hold each one personally responsible. I start to increase the intensity levels considerably.

He scuttles off and returns with a man around my age who is tall with receding hair. The man dismisses what I am saying. I say to him I have only one question for them. In English now.

“Why did they think it was fine to not ask me, to build without my permission, why?

He says that he has read about how tired I am and that they did not think that I would mind and that in any case there is not a lot I can do against a corporation like theirs.

I reiterate, “why did you think it was a good idea not to ask me?”

He says that they did not want to bother me and they thought that I would like this. I can have an honorarium for everyone who uses the path.

I switch back into French. I explain to him that a couple of decades ago I raised five million in start up funds and that the type of person who does this is not ordinary. That it is and was a very stupid thing to underestimate someone like me. I say that he is probably right that in the end they will “win” and I will loose money. I say that in the meantime I will make life incredibly difficult for them and that karmically speaking to behave in the manner towards me is utter stupidity. They do not understand quite how stupid.

As I say this I am swelling in intensity. The man who is used to being obeyed and having people fawn is finding the encounter very difficult. He does not know what to say or how to respond. His implicit threat has not worked. He looks nonplussed.

He says, “but we thought you would not mind and that we did not need to ask you. We thought we were right…”

I say that they have made a grave and serious mistake.

The dream ends.

Note – I am capable of an interpersonal intensity which very few have experienced. I hold back.

Atonement – Ruining Lives

September 14, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

The other night we watched a quintessentially English film called “Atonement”. It was very well acted and full of luvvies. The costumes and setting were excellent. It was full of repression and class tension. The gist of it was that a posh teenage girl lied about events, a possible sexual assault. As a consequence a lower class man previously sponsored through Cambridge by the family was arrested and gaoled for the assault. The young woman of the house {the sister of the informant} and he were finally opening up about their strong feelings for each other just before the event. He, the outsider, was sent to prison in disgrace and their relationship was severed. The young woman of the house left the family. All because of the younger sister’s lies, the stretching of “truth” by the teenage girl who was too embarrassed to change her story. Before she got to atone for her sins, her older sister died in a Nazi bombing of London and he died during the BEF retreat to Dunkirk. The young informant wrote a whole novel imagining the lovers together and her atonement. It was all made up in her head, something she imagined doing but never could. It was too late. She did not atone. She imagined making up a “happiness” for them atoned for her actions. In reality it did not nor could not.

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It shows that those fond of attention with a talkative tongue can invent shit and ruin the lives of others. Talk can literally derail lives. A few words in haste can have a devastatingly destructive impact. I am fairly sure that the basic gist of the story is played out time and again. The versions and circumstance vary, but lying for attention may be a very common theme. The film suggested that the protagonist who wrote a novel about the betrayal struggled with appreciating the impact and scale of what she did. Not everyone will struggle, the more sociopathic may feel justified and never think of it again. But if we are human we all kind of know when we have betrayed, let down and not been impeccable. Our conscience may vary. We may have a few nights on the pillow before sleep when the ghosts of deeds past parade before our mind. It may be more impactful and of a greater longevity.

It is often the outsider, the person who is not present, who has their lives ruined.

If we are so lucky as to be offered a chance to atone in some way for our deeds then the universe is kind to us. Should we fail to seize such a thing then our guilt may grow and metastasise. In reality we can never change nor undo the damage we have done. Any “sorry” if heartfelt is to assuage our own feelings of misdemeanour. Karmically it is at least an acknowledgement of responsibility and perhaps of learning. If we learn from misdemeanour then it has at least served some purpose. If we are a serial offender then pain and ruin has been wasted. It is wanton destruction.

It is logical that one lie almost invariably leads to others. Unless the truth is out, the lies propagate. The karma of lies can often be the perceived need for more lying, more falsehood. The causal impact of lies and exaggerations can be manifold.

A simple act can bifurcate through space-time.

Dream Yoga – Union

September 12, 2025September 12, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Last night there was another hectic night of dreaming, relating largely to people, acquaintances, of this lifetime. I know that we very rarely know another being well, nor what goes on in the recesses of their minds and their true predilections. This was explicit in the dream. At best we see façade. Which means that the vast majority of “relationships” lack authentic depth. We do not know ourselves or each other.

The frequency and subject matter of dreams this last couple of years has been without precedent even for me. We could approximate to a 500 word dream every 3-4 days. Subject matter has seemingly pertained to this life and to previous ones.

The dreams have indicated previous incarnations stretching back ~ ten lifetimes. With a putative recent one trying to “get through”. If this interpretation is correct then I have been continually associated with “the priesthood” and scholastic endeavour of one kind or another. A good proportion of these incarnations have had a Buddhist flavour.

I have one strong postulate.

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There are a number of people, specifically in this lifetime, who have unresolved karma pertaining to their interactions with me.

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I have no conscious grudges / axes to bear. Yet they keep on cropping up in dreams often wishing me ill.

The other growing notion is that somehow the dreaming is synthesising past life experience into a more cogent whole. A kind of pan-lifetime recapitulation. The life mentioned in the post previous is the one for which recall is the best. The one for which it is the most faint is my South American and thereby Jaguar life.

The weakly recalled most recent life seems to have had some Tibetan Buddhist flavour. Why this has only bled through a little in the last couple of years is unknown.

In a sense I may be “reborn” when I receive my new bionic hips. This may offer a new lease of life, largely unexpected for me. Maybe this is a dreaming preparation for what might lie ahead.

In a vision, which I can still recall, had well over a decade ago, I saw incarnation in a manner not dissimilar to an ECG trace. Where the flat line between “electrical signal” is life non carnate and the “heart beat” is life carnate. I saw this string of jewels, or pearls, stretching far back to before conventionally recorded human history.

Were I planning never to come back it might make sense to review lives {plural} before passing. To synthesise all into a whole.

Of course I am prepared to accept that I might be totally and utterly wrong or misguided. But the pattern is appealing to my penchant for neat arrangements however temporary they may be.

Quirks of Fate

September 6, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

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Ships that pass in the night, and speak each other in passing,
Only a signal shown and a distant voice in the darkness;
So on the ocean of life we pass and speak one another,
Only a look and a voice, then darkness again and a silence.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

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The notions of fate and destiny have been around for a while. They are related to prophecy in some respects. They are a logical summation of the cause & effect of karma and/or dependent origination. Once a chain of events has been set in motion the ongoing trajectory is inevitable. It becomes fated. Scientists even use the terminology of fate. They copy much poetic.

Many humans do not like to accept that aspects of their lives are pre-ordained. Some can use it as a chat up line, “hey babe we are soul mates and fate brought us together…”

Yet for many of us there are occasions when fate seems to play a hand. Something entirely unlikely can radically change our lives. We might call this an intervention of intuition, synchronicity or fate. We somehow just so happened to be in exactly the right place at exactly the right time. The odds against are large.

We could have missed our flight and that plane crashed. We could have swapped tickets with another just to meet the grim reaper on a Boeing 737. Fate it could be discussed is prone to exhibit quirks.

In the strict logic of fate it is impossible to forfeit a fate. Because if it was fated it will happen whether you like it or not. One path apparently open to you may not be taken. You have by fate forfeited that path. You were always fated so to do. So that path was not fated for you. No forfeit of fate, a different path was/is followed, according to fate.

Using the logic of fate. I was perhaps for countless lifetimes always fated to find myself here this afternoon, typing on this keyboard. I had no choice. It was preordained. I was for a while an academic but fate took me away from that path. Retrospect suggests that I was not in any case temperamentally equipped to work in and thrive in such an environment. It was fated that I became a loner-yogi-eccentric-pikey. So here I am.

I don’t know what fate has left for me “on the cards” so to speak. Fate will do the Tarot draw and maybe it has some quirks in store yet. I can’t know before hand, nor am I overly fussed. There is no need to be, because whatever happens it is fated, I cannot get out of it or escape it, it will happen whether I whinge and complain or not. I do not need to tempt fate by walking in the woods wearing camouflage during hunting season. Nor should I lock myself quivering indoors.

Likewise if you are fated to meet me, we will, whether you like it or not. I am probably more likely to be well prepared than you are. If we miss like ships passing in the night, then no meeting was “on the cards” a feather touch of possibility unmanifest in the web of life is all that is fated and therefore warranted. A passing that may not come again this lifetime or for that mater ever. This butterfly wing interaction may nevertheless be a tiny breath of air to direct you along your fated path.

Trying to run and squirm out of fate is a mug’s game. Sooner of later fate wins, it holds all the cards.

Fate is perhaps more omniscient and omnipresent than humans are willing to accept. It was always fated thus.

Chaotic Mess Dream etc. 05-09-2025

September 5, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Last night we watched “The Thursday Murder Club” which was enjoyable. I suspect that if I am in some kind of nanna community setting {soon?} I might well get involved in any protest. Somehow I might end up on some kind of committee.

Last night I had a series of dreaming snippets that went at rollercoaster speed. They were on a recurrent theme of MESS, massive messes made by others which somehow how pertain to me. They are not my messes to solve. Multiple people once acquainted to me are involved, they created these messes because of their behaviour to me. They have not treated me well and done stuff behind my back which cannot be undone. They have showed me a lack of respect. They have bad mouthed me in one way or another.

The snippets were so fast that I did not make significant effort to recall them.

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Somehow I do not the fit the mould of behaviour I am supposed to. I am not as they imagine someone with my background {reincarnations included} to be. People invariably judge a book by its cover.

The thing is “spiritual” and karmic messes cannot be solved via traditional wheeler-dealer-itchy-back-toady-cash-position-bribery games. Sorry does never unpick karmic debts. But people might imagine that the normal playbook always applies. They are mistaken.

In the Tibetan tradition it is customary to approach a high lama for blessings and to have them place a white silk-like khata scarf over your head. This is considered auspicious and the offering, in both directions, must be made with respect, compassion and purity of motive.

In our what-is-in-it-for-me day and age, purity of motive is as rare as a rare thing on the 29^th of February.

The dream was so chaotic and disordered, with people imagining that they could blag it, wing it and generally go through the motions and “get away with it”.

People try to use the same strategies and behaviour that gets them into messes as a way to extract themselves from said mess. This is not a sane or wise approach. But you cannot advise the omniscient in any meaningful way.

They know best after all…

They are insistent on repeating their folly over and over.

Does This Matter?

August 24, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

As a part of my personal end of year review, I like to review. One of the questions is, “does this matter?” “Is what I am doing here of any significance whatsoever?”

The only objective criteria I have for readership is supplied by WordPress stats. It tells me that there are around 400,000 words here spread among 575 posts over the last year or so. There have been a total of ~900 visitors. These come from France {Normandy and Paris region}, UK, USA. Spain. Germany, Canada and India. {In decreasing order of number of visitors.} The views are from diverse towns which might be real or arise from a floating IP used by many ISPs. That works out at about 450 words per visitor. The average post gets a few {literally} views.

Clearly my significance as a global influencer knows no bounds!!

On the basis of this it does not matter what I write because “nobody” is listening. Whatever idea or notion I come up with will sink without a trace in the petabyte torrents of this raging internet thingy. There is no point in me developing any of my ideas, just get them out of my head and move swiftly on. I can sit here dreaming away and the world at large goes about its business unperturbed.

We live in a surveillance society. There is an outside chance that some of my key words might pop up in an intelligence search. But I am not connected to any group. I am pacifist and hermit like. I am not a civil disorder problem. I don’t agree with Trump or Netanyahu. They are powerful men and face disagreement from others way more important than me. I doubt the NSA and MI6 are quaking in their bunkers.

To an extent I have drawn what meaning I can from the dream catalogue herein. I know how I interpret them and in what context. I have a number of theories about what they mean individually and collectively. I have clarity of sorts. One that does not need to be verbalised. I understand the wider potential implications. My understanding points at large tracts of unresolved karma burdening others. I cannot foresee them addressing this.

If I want to change things, then one do-able is to wipe the blog. I will still catalogue incoming dreams (privately) but I will create a space which might be filled with something, else. Sometimes a tiny change can be causative.

The growing trend is that each blog I write gets fewer and fewer views. Which says something.

I reckon that a hip replacement blog with what passes for my sense of humour would have a much larger readership…This could propel me into internet stardom. I could become a legend on my disability enabled throne hand crafted by Armitage Shanks.

Maybe I’ll sleep on it…