Cunning Ploy Dreaming Snippett – 02-02-2026

February 2, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

One of the recurring themes in my dreams along with “somebody else’s mess” is the “cunning ploy / plan” theme.

This theme arose in the dream last night concerning two people I once knew.

There is a certain kind of person which cannot resist trying to be cunning and using “clever” tricks to manipulate and seek some kind of advantage or gather some information. They have a play book of tricks and methods and a modus operandi which changes little. There is an expectation that these plays or ploys can be relied upon to secure similar results. They often have some kind of negotiation in mind usually of a transactional nature.

In never occurs to them to be open straightforward and honest. Their ploys can be “relied” upon to secure similar results.

I am pretty bored with the whole cunning ploy theme…Yawn…

If you play a cunning ploy delivery with a straight bat it can cause the ploy to go badly awry. No cunning required on my part just play straight.

–

–

My mother tried to elicit me to cajole her to come to my second wedding. She said that it was difficult and far for her. I replied that if that was the case then I would understand if she did not come.

Many people try to get some emotional manipulation leverage based upon “rules” to which they imagine others will comply. When it goes pear shaped it can be difficult. I can think of a quite a number of cases when other people’s cunning ploys have gone very badly wrong because I have played straight and not played their game. These ploy attempts have had major consequences.

Some people simply cannot conceive of being simple and straightforward. It is just beyond their ability. They do not approach with open hands or open hearts; they are after something.

It is just yawn-some.

For a while I was in “pastoral care” and many students tried to take advantage of the system / me. Unfortunately for them I was in the habit of taking notes and had a good memory. I was prone to repeat their prior narratives to them. Quite a number of schemes failed and the only people who knew were me and them. Confidentiality was important.

Quite why the “cunning ploy” theme is resurfacing again I do not know, but it has been noted by me…

Yawn…

Do I Have an Attitude Problem, Am I Too Irreverent?

January 31, 2026January 31, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

—————————————-

41. Bodhidharma Pacifies the Mind

Bodhidharma sits facing the wall. His future successor stands in the snow and presents his severed arm to Bodhidharma.

He cries: “My mind is not pacified. Master, pacify my mind.”

Bodhidharma says: “If you bring me that mind, I will pacify it for you.”

The successor says: “When I search my mind I cannot hold it.”

Bodhidharma says: “Then your mind is pacified already.”

—

Mumon’s comment: That broken-toothed old Hindu, Bodhidharma, came thousands of miles over the sea from India to China as if he had something wonderful. He is like raising waves without wind. After he remained years in China he had only one disciple and that one lost his arm and was deformed. Alas, ever since he has had brainless disciples.

Why did Bodhidharma come to China?
For years monks have discussed this.
All the troubles that have followed since
Came from that teacher and disciple.

————————————————-

Excerpted from“The Gateless Gate”,

by Ekai, called Mu-mon, tr. Nyogen Senzaki and Paul Reps [1934], at sacred-texts.com

————————————————-

I suspect that many people are uncomfortable with clarity. My own experimental evidence suggests that providing clarity can be unpopular and politically unwise. People are fond of brown nosing and otherwise sucking up to those with kudos related positional power. If one is not sufficiently reverent one can become a “problem”. Upsetting the applecart etc. can go down like a lead balloon on a planet with very high mass and low diameter.

If for example you think I have an attitude problem, where does that stem from? Is that from my behaviour or some preconceived idea you may have about how people are and should behave according to the gospel of you? If you say that I have an attitude problem are you in effect simply criticising your own reflection in a mirror?

Who defines which attitude is correct and/or appropriate?

Who is the expert and/or authority on this subject?

It is a part of my nature to take the piss. This can seem irreverent particularly to those who are pompous and very self-important.

I am reasonably confident that some people think that I am not sufficiently reverential and therefore I have an attitude problem. I don’t have a problem with my attitude but others might…

I had this sudden intuition this afternoon that people think I have a bad attitude…there is nothing I can do about what others think….

Dreaming Courses – Does the World Need Another Flaky Hippie?

January 31, 2026January 31, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Following on from this morning’s dream I typed the words “Dreaming Courses” into the font of all wisdom. Its Delphic reply shows me than my name is not groovy enough, my hairstyle is all wrong, I am from the wrong ethnic, age and gender demographic group and am too well educated in the physical sciences. My relationship with Amazonian and Mongolian spiritual leaders is past its sell by date. My pygmy tutor from the Congo when I was aged 12 was a very long time ago. I am not keen on astral projection and my shamanic practice never got off the ground as a business. Neither am I internationally “renowned”. I do however have Celtic roots. I have no scientific training in the psychology of REM based dream understanding. I would not be authorised to do a TED talk and I have not been endorsed by any church, spiritual lineage or famous guru-geezer.

It looks like I am buggered then.

That is unless I invent some groovy sounding name, grow a beard and establish a pony tail. Perhaps I might get given a vision in the midst of Breton stone megaliths at full moon near the solstice. That way I can claim inspiration for my courses. Fée Morgane might lend me her powerful amber amulet of dreams.

This theme of doing dreaming courses has been recurrent in the dreaming for me. I did give one course about fifteen years ago called “The Art of Dreaming” at a place with the name of “The Academy of Dreams” not far from Euston Station in London.

There is a fundamental difficulty. People are very glamoured by the notion of Lucid Dreaming. This is not dreaming as I understand it. Dreaming needs to be allowed to happen. The flow must not be interfered with by quasi-conscious thought. There is no quick fix nor gratification. Actively imagining yourself slaying a dragon or being surrounded by horny dakinis is fantasy not dreaming.

People and organisations are skilled at self-promotion and SEO. So what you find on line is in effect marketing led. Some people make a living out of doing / giving dreaming courses. In order to begin dreaming as I understand it, it helps to have philosophical concept, a framework within which to initially understand. This needs to be well embedded.

As I understand it those most likely to be skilled at dreaming are introverted and will feel no desire to soap box nor be the centre of attention.

Talking inhibits dreaming.

This includes the wretched internal dialogue or monkey mind which plagues most people.

Although this theme of giving dreaming courses keeps re-presenting I can see no way to even begin to try to bring this about.

It is a moot point whether the world needs any more courses on dreaming whether on-line or in person…

Coffee and Memory – Dream Follow Up

January 30, 2026January 30, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

In the dream this morning I was back in an area of London I thought I once knew well around Albemarle Street, Dover Street, Mayfair and St James. I might still be able to navigate all the cut throughs. I have been both to the Royal Society of Chemistry and The Royal Society. I’ll speculate that I have encountered 5% of the jolly good fellows in the latter. I have met presidents of both august bodies. I can claim to have been once associated with three “important” centres of learning in London namely UCL, The Royal Institution and Imperial College.

But clearly the coffee is not all that good.

–

–

There is no acceptable physiological explanation of how memory might transfer between incarnations. There is no scientifically accepted proof that reincarnation happens. Memory in so far as science has it must have some kind of biological explanation perhaps something to do with synaptic frameworks, neural nets and so-called muscle memory.

I’ll speculate that because of what I have done to myself in terms of recapitulation, erasing personal history, dreaming and meditation my “wiring” may no longer be entirely conventional.

Neuroscience talks of emotions; what happens if you have meditated them away?

The idea presented in the dream that memory is counter entropic is not entirely silly. One has to organise a recollection of the perception of observed phenomenon into a coherent {or otherwise} pattern to make sense of it and as an aide memoire in its retelling. Organising anything out of a stochastic chaos reduces the overall entropy. This requires some kind of energetic input. Thermodynamics suggests that organisation always gives way to a less organised status. Keeping anything organised takes effort.

On death the chemical factory ceases producing energy and no further work is done.

There is anecdotal “evidence” that some can recall past lives or key events therein. Such evidence cannot ever be proven. My own view is that some kind of realisation or mental training must be required to transfer any non-traumatic memory across incarnations. Wishful thinking and a grandiosity seeking for importance amongst the otherwise mundane might be a motive behind reported recall. Memory recall is probably not a common or garden thing, despite what some might say to sound cool or chat up others.

There is no way memory could be transferred unless one evokes a “thing” some kind of entity which takes on another body.

No entity – no past life recall. The logic is sound. {Thinking only of the measurable physical plane.}

If there is an entity and memory has some kind of molecular basis, a biological basis, then in order to recall this the entity must organise the biology so that physiologically it can be read, by chemical or electrochemical means. That memory may have persistence and longevity or it might fade in a haze of skunk. Somehow the entity “writes” the memory into the new biology.

The entity must influence the biology. A non carnate entity cannot use the computer keyboard. There must be some kind of relationship between the entity and its meat. If there is not an entity then it is just my meat typing here.

If you are convinced that reincarnation does not occur. Then by definition past life recall is impossible and poppycock. Anything resembling such a memory would be found an alternate explanation. One more to taste.

In a past life I seem to remember haunting Mayfair and St James. I seem to remember The Clarence in Dover Street and Tennent’s Extra by the gallon. Nowadays you could probably get a coffee there.

If it is possible to have a past life in a given life, it might be possible to transfer memory from a past life into a new life. I no longer pertain to my old world from London. I have been “reborn” as a hermit in Brittany…

Planning Blight – Significant or Cul-de-sac

January 28, 2026January 28, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Because of the endless media exposure to drone-voice man in DC the world has a dose of planning blight. What will the ENTP {each new thought propels} president come up with next? Excited for a moment until others think things through for him he turns his attention this way and that with an ADHD like conceptual stability and no attention to detail. If it does not work immediately he loses interest. He has undone decades of American global leadership because it was not him that did it. There are indicators of a difficult financial time ahead with rats on the ship heading for gold and silver.

People are quietly finding others to rely upon. He is not good for planning because there are fires to fight which he constantly lights with the next “great” idea which floats through his mind. He feels the need to share these ideas because he is a “stable genius”.

Personally the swing to nationalist so-called popularism, which is of course a euphemism, has implications for us. A change in tide could have us expelled as low-income immigrants. Unfortunately we are not George and Amal. We could not realistically claim political asylum here.

The last two months have seen me have six intense dreams of a Buddhist and Tibetan Buddhist flavour. The wife said that if I was advising anyone else I would deem them significant. It is a week now since the last of these and I am already “concluding” that there is a shift in dreaming away from these and that a “chapter” has closed at least for now. The time has passed and life moves off in a different direction. I am thinking “that was interesting” and that is about as far as it goes. Were it a movie the plot could change with some monk-geezer in robes tipping up at the gate. Similarly all the “intelligence” dreams have faded which suggests that the thread too is also fading. None of them appear to have gone “anywhere” thus they are a form of dreaming cul-de-sac.

Something has changed.

My life has had seemingly sudden and large changes in direction before. So I am prepared for that. But I am not expecting that. The two key external things, permit to stay and operation, will have provisional answers in the next two months. The internal things our health, mine and the wife’s, also impact. Because we have no structure and I live hermit like, one day runs into the next..

–

–

One could argue that my proper tonal is that of an isolated loner, socially withdrawn and soon to become a byline in a newspaper report about some travesty I am yet to commit. Loners are always suspect.

“He was a loner and did not mix well with the community. Tsk, tsk, tsk…I told you so!”

We are struggling to know what day of the week it is because we are, at least for now, relatively appointment free.

One could argue that I need to give fate a helping hand by being more “out there” in the wider currents of life. Fate cannot unfold if I “hide” from it.

We need to downsize; we do not know when nor where to.

We have a local planning blight because of the right to stay issue and the yes/no hip operation question.

On the cards is some DIY in the top kitchen. It should take a couple of weeks…on and off…The ceiling needs a wash and de-grease first…

I have never before dreaded opening the news on TV wondering what I might see…it is not uplifting or cheerful.

Strange times we live in…

Am I a Figment of My Own Imagination?

January 26, 2026January 26, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Over the last few days, on and off, I have had a sensation of something going on. That has a kind of French connection. It pertains to some people I have never met. Being objective I am very unlikely to ever meet them. We do not move in the same circles, nor are we likely to. I could be imagining it, or it could be real. I have no way of knowing for sure.

I do have a fairly good imagination. {My self-assessment}

A while back an ex-tutee of mine got back in touch with me. He told me that he had great difficulty finding me on-line. That I was difficult to trace. He was of a younger more tech savvy generation. In the end he used an email address which he had not used for a long time. The problem is that my name is common and that there are a lot of people with that name who are more readily found in search engines, they are more “famous” than me. Without additional key words I cannot be readily found in search engines.

In academia one is encouraged to have a profile with contact details. People do not just disappear without trace. I just tried my old email address and it does not work. No surprise. People may not imagine one sailing off the edge of the world. They may imagine you to be always contactable.

If I have no current named online presence do I exist? If there is no social media am I real or imaginary? If I am not on WankedIn can I be a professional?

There is no witness outside of this house/compound who can vouch for any claimed past history. I could have been spinning people a line…

Many of the people I was contemporary with are seemingly retired. They are dying out. I could have read the research papers of some arbitrary person and kidded myself that I wrote them. There is no proof, no witness, no referee. I have not left much of a tangible mark.

If we clean out our emails we may lose contact with people. This may at the time be intentional but that may be the only slim thread of contact. We may find a need to contact someone and they have disappeared into the aether. What we do in a pique, we may later regret.

People do not imagine others going “missing” or off the reservation.

I am pretty clear as to what my day to day reality is. A man has just delivered 885 kg of propane.

There is a whole other side which could only be imaginary or dream like. That side makes up ~ half a million words in a blog. If it is out of my brain, out of my mind, is it real? There is no physical manifestation other than in a blog. I am not passing it on in another way. It is a figment, temporary and impermanent in nature. Many texts online reference impermanent sources. There are many missing links. This too is impermanent.

There is a photo here taken a couple of days ago. It is possibly the only photo of me on the internet. That is unless you can trawl way back archived posts.

I could be lying. I could have taken someone else’s photo and be a catfish.

Many of us tell ourselves stories about who and what we are, what we stand for and are like. Many of those stories differ from those others hold and tell about us. Our personal narrative or legend differs from those more widely held.

We are all therefore figments of our own imagination.

There is a vague feeling of waiting for something. There are two important decisions upcoming which are not ours alone to make. These are whether or not my right to stay in France is approved and whether or not the new surgeon sees it fit and/or timely to operate and give me another new artificial hip.

These will define the year in a much more tangible way than anything I rabbit on about here. They are not figments they have real measurable physical plane outcomes.

O still small voice of calm

January 25, 2026January 25, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

—————

Drop Thy still dews of quietness,
till all our strivings cease;
take from our souls the strain and stress,
and let our ordered lives confess
the beauty of Thy peace.

Breathe through the heats of our desire
Thy coolness and Thy balm;
let sense be dumb, let flesh retire;
speak through the earthquake, wind and fire,
O still small voice of calm!

John Greenleaf Whittier

——————–

Over the last few days I have been on an off back with Narziß und Goldmund. A duality of aspects of me. I have according to my dreams been more often Narziß.

The journey into searching for me really began with St Francis and his famous prayer.

—

Là où sont les ténèbres, que je mette la lumière.

Là où est la tristesse, que je mette la joie.

Ô Seigneur, que je ne cherche pas tant à être consolé qu’à consoler, à être compris qu’à comprendre, à être aimé qu’à aimer.

—

In which he expresses his heartfelt bodhisattva vows.

I have yet to find a more erudite expression for contact with one’s soul than “o still small voice of calm.”

Which reminds us that no matter what is transpiring there is something which persists and remains unsullied by all that drama. It is an injunction to detach and not to be such a drama queen caught and enthralled in the maelstrom of emotions. The words exhort one to achieve balance and perspective. It suggests being the calm in the storm. It hints that ambitious striving is not the be all and end all.

We could all of us do with a little more near silent reconnection with our essence. For so often the quiet whispering wisdom of our soul, our inner being, is drowned out in the hectic cacophony of modern existence. Our list of seemingly oh so important devoirs inundates us and our FOMO steers us like a tiny boat in a raging tempest.

We have often lost touch with our soul, our anchor.

Our inner candle which burns softly and which silently radiates can be missed in the loud relentless fake CGI of modern ways. It is not flashy and relentless. It not unnerving and unsettling. It is always there should we seek it.

We should all endeavour to be more attentive to the vital utterances of our still small voices of calm.

Open-source intelligence (OSINT) and Pandora’s Box

January 24, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Mucking around on the web this morning I found a new term OSINT

————–

Open-source intelligence (OSINT) refers to the process of gathering information from sources available to anyone, ranging from websites, social media platforms, forums, public records, and user-generated multimedia content. The value of OSINT lies in its cost-effectiveness, accessibility, and real-time nature. Rather than relying solely on classified or hard-to-access data, analysts use OSINT to uncover vulnerabilities, track emerging threats, and validate critical intelligence quickly.

In the race to keep pace with rapidly evolving situations, from cyberattacks and geopolitical shifts to natural disasters, efficient analysis techniques are necessary. Integrating a balanced mix of automated tools, manual verification, and advanced methodologies enhances speed, accuracy, and overall operational effectiveness.

Source : https://www.gmrtranscription.com/blog/osint-techniques-for-intelligence-gathering

——————

Following on from the dream this morning I have had a quick look for recent obituaries of women in their sixties in and near Strasbourg. I found two. I left it at that.

It is pretty common these day to ask the font of all wisdom a.k.a. Google and to gather intelligence {stalk} on others we know or once knew. An IT professional I knew said to me that I had little or no idea as to what the internet is capable of and how a skilled user can get information from it. My days of being up to date and modern are long gone. My state of the art is two decades old. I am not an avid user of intravenous smartphone drugs and fixes. I am not umbilically linked thereto. My ‘phone is on for no more than two-three hours a week, this when I go to the physio.

In some ways the internet is a bit like Pandora’s box. We can find it hard not to peek and check upon on someone. A quick glance en passant is probably OK. A more obsessive deep dive is obsessive and unhealthy. We may unleash knowledge, titbits and gossip which is unexpected. We can find out shit we did not know and do not want to know. We can become enthralled. We may mentally make a note to contact someone and then chicken out. We may be embarrassed that we have been stalking someone. To contact them would be to break the bubble.

There is some weird shit associated with internet usage.

Now that the WWW Pandora’s box is open a host of ills have been visited upon the world. A ranting president being one of them.

Because this blog is open it can be used for OSINT purposes. People could be reading it and analysing it. I do not know what key word trawls could stumble upon it. There is an outside chance that it gets flagged up to some spook or other. There is an outside chance that some nutcase(s) from my past is(are) obsessing and reading every word. A few may swing by in a healthy manner from time to time.

I don’t know. That is the thing, I really don’t know.

People may be opening their own personal Pandora’s box by snooping on the blog.

Following on from various dreams I have looked into relics, tantra and mantra. I am fairly lucky in that I have a well developed sense of what may or may not be BS and spin so I can filter without belief. I can also accept without belief. If you help undergraduates and postgraduates write cogently you can spot streams of waffle. I know a tidy well researched article when I see one.

According to what I have seen in the font I have been doing unsupervised tantric practice for over a decade and a half. It is a moot point as to whether I am still sane or not. The gurus advise against this kind of thing.

I started Gayatri in 2010. I have a book coming on the Gayatri mantra early next week. Apparently depending upon level of realisation how you chant this has differing effects. I am looking forward to the monograph which will be in French.

Because my mind can be quite fluid it tickles me to imagine anyone trying to make “sense” of what is written in this blog. It is not meant to be a manifesto or well organised. It is a hobby blog in which I write up what may or may not be happening.

If you think I am sending you personal messages you might wish to consider consulting a psychiatrist.

As a rule of thumb I pick up a thread of interest, sometimes from dreams, and then explore it until it reaches a dead end or having gotten the gist I become bored.

The Buddhist dream thread seems to have self-closed. There was the dream of my putative prior death and then the dream of relics which led me to looking at the end scriptures for Siddartha. There is a nice kind of “closure”…

What the hell I am doing dreaming about Strasbourg remains to be seen…I missed a truly massive dreaming symbol the first time I went there…the second time in 2000 my life was very complex and about to get even more complex with a high technology start up.

Fuck knows how I survived the first few years of this century…

If I have unwittingly been doing top end tantra then one could say that I have opened a different kind of Pandora’s box…it seems I mixed Vedic and Vajrayana tantra.

Maybe I already knew how or maybe I am just a nut job risk taker….

I have a new ring binder folder for putting my dream print outs in. I will know when it is time to start it…

…

Holy Relics and There Must Be Miracles

January 23, 2026January 23, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

Following up on the theme of relics of Buddha yesterday, it is clear that they are a big deal and very important to many people. Hundreds of thousands turn up to have a walk by. These come for at best a glimpse. For me wanting to preserve goes against the doctrine of non-attachment and impermanence. For others there is a notion of sanctity and something out of the ordinary. Perhaps a kind of beacon, a beacon of hope. They are emblematic and touch something primordial and core deep.

As an erstwhile chemist and materials scientist I understand that bone phosphate and tooth enamel might survive a cremation at an unknown al fresco cremation temperature. But these fragments will be brittle and may not last with structural integrity for two and a half millennia. That being said they may well have been cared for with devotion and care. Some were buried under stupas.

My scepticism suggests that not all relics, Buddhist and Christian, can be as claimed. A relic has a totemic power in the psyche. It can confer right to kingdom; there are elements of ritual magic like with the stone of Scone. Whoever holds the cup which held the blood of Jesus has totemic power and bragging rights. Wars can be fought over relics. The grail stories are embedded in the collective consciousness and mythos. There are relics here in Brittany. My science mind asks the question, “just how many fingers did these holy people have?”

It is a part of religious logic that there must be miracles. Miracles are the proof of the pudding of deity and sanctity. Without miracles deity or Buddhahood cannot be invoked.

Back then nobody could have envisaged the Large Hadron Collider at CERN.

It is well known that with each telling a story changes and that embellishment to encourage audience participation and appreciation is common. Recently I have heard re-tellings of the story of Ceridwen and Taliesin. I am familiar with the source code but the text gets dramatically enhanced for a You Tube audience. It is reasonable to suggest that human nature has not changed hugely in that any story is prone to exaggeration over time. Which means that the use of sodium chloride is recommended, a pinch at a time.

It does not mean however that the spirit, the underlying meaning, should be lost. Take out the baby before pulling the bath plug.

In looking at ancient text it is helpful to be mindful of the use of parable and metaphor with out being dogmatic about verbatim meaning. To search for an illustrative metaphor as if it were fact is a fool’s errand. Though it does make good box office. My mother’s maiden name was Jones. According to 23andMe Indiana is a distant cousin of mine. I have a genetic predisposition to treasure hunting and finding sacred totems in a deadly race against the baddies.

It is a weird thing a part of society needs, wants to see, miracles as proof. Another part wants to disprove and pooh-pooh. Why must there be miracles?

In the context of relics, objects of faith, power and magic are embodied therein. A sight, a touch, a prayer may ease whatever ills and plagues one. Those who control such totems may control access and have power over any would be pilgrim. These days they may even charge an entrance fee.

Human religious creed and dogma developed by the clergy always diverges from the core scriptures. The socio-political practice veers away from the simple and the ideal. The basic messages are watered down and room for manoeuvre and excuse are built in to what the Sacerdotes profess. I remember that all religion is by way of a business too.

I struggle to reconcile how something corporeal, physical and object can carry the spirit, the magic, the essence. Once vacated matter remains matter. It is no longer animated or organised. As a meditative totem it may work, but having an inherent power of its own, I am unconvinced.

If a relic works as a meditative aid, then it is useful. If one imagines all the good things of a Buddha focussed therein and uses this as aspirational, that is good. Wanting to rise lotus like out of the mire of corporality is no bad thing.

My own take is that seeking a miracle or two, seeking something special, detracts from the mundane reality of here and now. Which is where all the “work” needs to be done. Seeking the miraculous and the showy is not where “it” is at. There is a kind of sword from the stone glamour in a miracle.

I suspect that the truly miraculous is seemingly insignificant and does not attract any attention. It is so not showy, that it goes unnoticed. People do not see it nor appreciate it when it is a simple sublime. The complete invisibility of the simple and uncomplicated is quite miraculous.

Here am I sitting in a tin can – dreaming

January 20, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

—

For here
Am I sitting in a tin can
Far above the world
Planet Earth is blue
And there’s nothing I can do

Though I’m past one hundred thousand miles
I’m feeling very still

David Bowie

——

Outside it is chucking it down. We are due 15mm in the next hour or so.

The recovery from the hip hop hip op seems to be going well. At a guess I am doing slightly better than “normal” for a fat bastard of my age and previous substance intake. It seems that physically I will be more able than I have been for a couple of years.

The residual fate question remains unanswered. We could try to sell the house and move. We do need to downsize but we can afford another year here.

So far the dreaming has not pointed at any obvious option aside from doing “dreaming courses”. There has been some hint at uncovered knowledge. And I did once get a suggestion for a new book. Whilst I could write one, I doubt it would get published unless I self-published. I don’t have the kind of provenance which makes a good sales pitch. I am not airy-fairy and flaky enough. I am conservative. Nor am I in a university neuroscience or psych-ward {psychology department}.

The take home message that I have received from the world so far is , “don’t start anything, it will get complex and then go pear shaped”.

There is an ancillary, “don’t try to get in contact with anyone it will be ignored and/or cause a massive drama.”

People have busy lives and they do not want to be disturbed by the rattling chains of ghosts from days gone by. I do not seek to inflict myself into the lives of others.

I have done zero SEO on this site. The idea being if someone finds it they were kind of meant to.

I am reasonably clear that I have very little to offer anyone who might be embarking on a meditation/soul searching journey. I might be of more use to some who has travelled a bit. It is moot.

I could easily be kidding myself.

I am not convinced that anyone needs to take refuge in a sangha. If you want to liberate, read the text meditate and get busy. A sangha could hold you back…by peer coercion and FOMO related drama.

There is a reasonable notion that I could generate around five grand in the January to June pre-exam “A” level science tutoring period in the UK {2027} . Some people are charging shit loads per hour. We could just about afford to live in the UK. In the second year with good “Trustpilot” reviews I could easily double or quadruple this. I could probably sustain this for a couple of years before I rebelled against the dogmatic marking schemes. This might take me to state pension age.

Not really any the wiser…

It is still early doors for 2026…given what orange-boi in DC is soap boxing about anything might happen…

Why do Americans keep having old men as presidents?

It is not really my business but the ill-will generated there does impinge and echo around the world.

Disharmony…selfishness and unpleasantness…

A misuse of power…

All that optimism of 1989-90 has faded…

With dread I wonder what lessons humanity is calling forth for itself… how will the world look in a decade?

America may be powerful but by no means is it great in the fullest sense and meaning of the word. The example being set is retrogressive. It is old…