When people change it can be difficult for others to a) note the change b) accept the change and c) assimilate that change in to new ways of perception, assimilation and interaction. People often interpret others though a largely historical lens and previous shared social context. They struggle to see the changed spots on a leopard, even if that leopard is now a zebra. Dogma suggests that it is impossible. It cannot be so.
A while back I ran into someone whom I knew from one context. I had the feeling that she had not yet noticed I was different. I knew that she was a highly intelligent nuclear physicist who had worked at the nuclear physics facility in Dubna. I suggested that she recalibrate her detectors in respect of how she was perceiving and hence interacting with me. She listened and got the notion. I too started from a more flexible view of her. As a consequence we managed to communicate fairly well with each other. It took a little while to “find” each other.
People can have very fixated views of others, fixated opinions and hard wired biases. The better we think we know someone the more rigid are our views of how they are and might still be.
For a long time I was an evangelical vegan. This lasted for not far off a decade. Eating a beef steak in front of someone you have lectured, evangelised to and otherwise bored shitless is a true game changer and a re-arranger of perception. Often some radical enactments of drama are impossible. I have joked that were I to tip up wearing Buddhist monastic robes unexpected and visit an erstwhile acquaintance it could be a bit of a mind fuck for them. Although I could perhaps buy some garb on line I would not wear them as I have not been ordained in this life.
There are some things that are very hard for people to accept. This is because to do so would require and perhaps initiate a radical change in the narrative which they have held. It could re-arrange the sense they make of the world and the story or legend they have told themselves.
How might a science professor interact with a high lama tulku incarnation? What is the correct protocol? What is the correct ordering of cheese?
Between ~12 and 12:35 this afternoon, French time, I experienced a phenomenon of visual disturbance in which the perceptual field, mostly left eye, started to warp and acquire an unusual brightness. I usually associate changes like this with something big and impactful happening in the web of life. Something of import, somewhere, was going on. I was standing on our small indoors scaffold painting the ceiling. It is best to take great care whilst these phenomena occur, especially if one is up high. I was near my limit of standing, getting close to two hours painting. Tiredness leads to accident and with osteoporosis a fall is unwise. I am not as steady as I once was. I can only stand for around two hours at a time now before the fatigue and pain overwhelm. It saves us money if I paint and we want the room finished before I have my total hip replacement fitted. For me there are maybe one or two more sessions of painting before I stop. The nurse was adamant that I should do no DIY in the week leading up to the operation. A scratch or cut could increase the infection risk on my right leg.
My mobility is not good. People might remember me differently and to see me hobble could change perception a little. How and in what other ways they might recalibrate their detectors might be moot. If you only knew me in one context it might be difficult to accept me as a pikey retired person.
I’ll speculate that very many people are in no way as open minded as they imagine themselves to be. They can be very set in their ways, their perceptions and try to shoe-horn observables to fit prior narratives.
In general people do not believe that their detectors need recalibration even when experimental evidence suggests that they might. Only something major might prompt the start of the recalibration. Some will need a huge discrepancy to even accept as a hypothesis that their detectors need a tweak, a recalibration. Even though said detectors might be out of warranty.
Dreamyoga 