Impermanence – Cop Out or Motivation?

The trouble is you think you have time...

Siddhartha Gautama

I have paraphrased here something I read in the Dhammapada. In this the notion that there is always tomorrow or mañana and demain is hinted at. People can put things off over and over. This especially  true of anything which is inconvenient. Even though they know that they need to address something they put it off. People can justify inaction to themselves rather than put themselves out or do something positive perhaps transformative. The safety of the unpleasant status quo of life is so tempting; the inertia of sameness is like a duvet. The fear of risk forbids any reward for courage.

It is evident that life is impermanent. Everyone without exception dies. Which means that allotted time is finite.

It is easy to fall into the trap of “hey man all is impermanent” and use that as a cop out for not doing anything. If nothing lasts, nothing matters, so why bother? If  all of life is an illusion then why interact, why take part?

It is easy to take an overly passive view on karma. If everything is pre-ordained and fated because of past actions why try to ameliorate? That is a gist of karma. At some stage you have to interact in a meaningful way to work with your karma and acquire karmic merit. You have to learn the lessons that karma has in store and which you have selected for yourself by your actions. Karma is there to teach. You need to learn your lessons otherwise you repeat your folly ad infinitum.

Impermanence teaches that you have little or no time in which to act and yet you must not be obsessed about result or outcome because these are not permanent or real.

It is easy to get the balance wrong and be overly dismissive and fatalistic or to try to force things to fit how you want them to be and thereby create more karma. If you put things off you are deciding so to do. Procrastination cannot work on karma.

You have no time, much less leisure than you imagine, so get busy but do so without obsession or desire for guarantee. Impermanence teaches that all forms of obsession are folly. It also teaches that you have little time to figure out what it is you need to learn and then to seek out those lessons.

In any given life, time is not a luxury which one in reality has.

Copping out because things are impermanent is copping out, it is a form or “reasoned” and “excused” inertia and avoidance.

Whereas impermanence might encourage you not to waste a single second of your allotted time.

Working with impermanence as a fact to acquire skill and discernment is a very profound and meaningful practice.

Impermanece teaches balance and the middle way.

Geocentrism and Perception

For many centuries the powers that be and the so-called wise held a view that the heavens rotated around the centre of the universe, aka Earth. Looking out from Earth it was assumed that we were the very epicentre of all God’s creation. This understanding has been proven wrong by the use of modern electromagnetic astronomy. Yet people were adamant that the world revolved around them and any disagreement in public could be fatal, a taboo punishable by excommunication, shunning and execution.

This innate human tendency towards self-diagnosed omniscience persists to this day in various forms.

One could postulate that a self-centred world view is very common. This holds for institutions and individuals. Moreover a kind of gravitational attraction is assumed. Say for example you were a Harvard or an Oxford university you might assume that would be scholars of merit would be irrevocably attracted to you, both to share in your divine reputation and the chance to participate in highbrow scholarly intercourse. People see things from their own point of view. To some a “Hogwarts” school dinners form of collegiate catering may be attractive to others it is not.

Those with power and reputation might assume that this is attractive to others and these exert a quasi-gravitational pull. Moths are drawn to the candle flame. Seen from the inside one sees an attractiveness which externally may not hold. A self-centred perception may lack accuracy.

I have seen some of the mythos associated with a university I worked at briefly. It was held in high regard by some less so by me. My perception was based upon experience and not PR or mythos.

Some people are very corporate in their thinking. Imagining that some corporate or institutional identity is attractive. I once went to an Accenture “do” while I was a start-up founder with a lot of dosh in the bank. All the young guns were full of themselves and very Accenture on-board. All they could see were the internecine pecking order, rankings and power struggles. They knew best. They did not leave a good impression on me. I thought that they were a bunch of wankers. These ambassadors for Accenture left me thinking that the organisation was full of bellends. I wanted no more to do with it ever.

When you are caught up in an institution, church or cult it is very easy to become enamoured and imagine oneself the best thing since sliced bread. The group perception internally may differ significantly from that held externally.  For example other Buddhist groups may think that the Dzogchen and Bon influenced Tibetan Buddhism is bad for Buddhism as a whole. Although the Dalai Lama is arguably the most famous Buddhist one might question as to the type of being this attracts towards Buddhism. The difference between high Tibetan ritual and Thai Forest simplicity is marked. There is a cultural agenda in Tibetan Buddhism which extends past sutra and towards a national historical identity. I don’t know to what extent reflection is made. Evangelism of any kind suggests an imagined innate superiority of world view which must be shared with others. A similar story might hold for STEM advocacy in schools. Everyone must be blessed by the all-encompassing wisdom of the STEM doctrine and creed. All hail the standard model. Blessed be its name.

When you are within the encircled wagons out on the wild prairie armed with your trusty Winchester rifles, it is easier to kill the Apache. After all he is the ignorant savage and you are the God fearing pioneer enacting justified ethnic cleansing in the name of the Lord. It is your divine right to drive the indigenous off their lands. They need your conversion to go to heaven.

Humans can believe whatever it is convenient for them to believe and their ability to seemingly justify slaughter and murder to themselves continues unabated to this day.

When you look in a geocentric, self-centred  manner anything out there is an enemy to be conquered and slain. They must revolve around you or die.

Mathematically whether that be with spherical or cartesian coordinates perception starts at the origin, the self, which is placed at the centre of the world, the centre of the known universe. Many imagine that the entirety of creation revolves around them, their wants, their needs and their petty grudges and complaints.

Although historically Geocentrism has been determined to be inaccurate, a poor model of reality, many fail to see that their whole view is self-centred. Me-centrism. They fail to see that they too are old fashioned and archaic in their notions of world. This observation applies to even the most intelligent amongst us. Intelligence can confer a sense of entitled arrogance. Those on Olympus after all, know what is best for us plebs.

Many people whose perception is very self-centred imagine that it is right and dandy that this should be the case.

——————

Does the entire universe revolve around you, are you the very centre of all creation?

Are you the flame to which all moths are irresistibly drawn by your magnificence?

Curiosity Not Power

I had a bit of a tough time with some hip pain during the night. I still can’t lie on the operation-scar side for more than a few minutes. But during the night I must have rolled over onto it and I awoke with some considerable pain. I could have taken some codeine and gotten up for shite TV. Instead I tried to ride it out. Which gave time for consideration.

I have a working assumption that my residual fate for this life encompasses not a lot more than gardening, DIY and a couple of hobby blogs. There remains little more significant for me to do. What I am interested in, is not an interest shared by many. It is largely curiosity driven on my part. There is no pecuniary worth.

Reflecting back one of the drivers for me has been the question, “is this possible?”. Once I have answered this question at gist level I am usually done, satisfied. I then get a little bored until the next curiosity arrives. I am certainly more interested in looking into things rather than applying them. Once I learned how the research grant application game worked and even managed to get a few quid, it was no longer as interesting for me. I was not motivated by peer approval. Yes at one stage it was a part of my job. I did not burn with passion and drive. I did not want to be boss nor some big cheese. I did have to adopt a defensive posture of sorts. I was not interested in fame.

From time to time I have found myself in situations where others may have deemed me to have some power, positional or by association. I was not interested in exerting that power certainly in a power over sense. I did not ever want minions. I was not ambitious about career advancement and could not really be arsed to apply for promotion.

Retrospect suggests that this orientation was ill suited to societal expectations. People did compete with me for power in some situations. They appeared to want something more than I. I never really got this drive nor was I overly anxious about protecting my “position”.

I guess basically I have not felt that gut wrenching insecurity which others appear to have nor have I sought to remedy it by some kind of external verification of validation. Peer related kudos is not important to me. I don’t need a tick or a gold star from teacher.

The most enjoyable part of doing a start-up was writing the business plan and then pitching it to see if it got funded. It did. It would probably have been better to simply stop the process there. Instead a company was formed etc. The proof of principle was done. In principle it was {is} possible to dream up a business plan and get it funded. It would have saved everybody a lot of hassle if it stopped there with no money changing hands. It would not however have put dinner on the table in 50 households.

In many of my explorations I am happy when I feel that I have the gist of it. There is no need to delve deeper into detail. A rough understanding of overall gist suffices. Once I have that I get a bit bored and repetition does not enthral.

So much is driven by an initial curiosity which can be quite quickly sated. The level of curiosity these days is rather muted. Perhaps I am jaded.

I have a notion that because people are fascinated by power and maybe lack power themselves they imagine that others are power hungry. This obsession with pecking order and power drives many behaviours. It is impossible to convince people obsessed thus, that it is not a major motivator for me. There are many people who are disinterested in power, they however may be disappointed in those who wield power. Many people want so badly to be big cheeses in some arena or other…

Yup where I got to in the wee small hours was that curiosity is more of a driver for me and that gist usually suffices…

two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl

———-

We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl, year after year

Running over the same old ground, what have we found?

Pink Floyd

————-

The {western} world lacks courage to even begin to question the way it “lives”. It is largely comfortable, though bored. It is comfortably numb. It goes through the motions of life; it exists as opposed to lives. Life is repetitive. There is not enough entertainment generated by {AI} algorithm on Netflix and the like. Net-fix can be had from the data pushers at around ten euros a month. There is a repetitive mediocrity similar to the 1970s middle of the road, which at least gave painful birth to punk. The world is in a “safe” doldrum numbed by the opiates of social media and endless trite imagery. It slices itself with plastic surgery, fills itself with chemicals and scars with tattoo. Allegedly mental health is in decline. The notion of being offended and entitled is pervasive. Complaint is all around us. And all we hear about these days upon the high altar is “deal” none of which are permanent, nor worth the paper upon which they are written. The insidious mantra percolates. A deal is professed as the answer.

The fear of being cancelled is a new 21st century one. Incorrect usage of Newspeak has the baying mob of vigilante thought police at the door. A polished glossy fake mediocrity is the ticket to fame and fortune. We have grey as a pervasive life tone. Table turning, upsetting the apple cart or boat rocking, are taboo. Against this the quasi-fascist nationalist right wing grows more vocal and separative.

Remember folks we tried nationalist fascism last century and it did not go so well…

People who are generally comfortable are very risk averse. They fear missing out on the latest trend or fad. They dread being shunned by whichever tribe they imagine a belonging to. It seems human folly is more addictive than ever. They will not twist; they stick with the cards they have. Because the erroneous notions of guarantee and proof beforehand, have taken hold. No bodhisattva has ever given a Tripadvisor five star rating for their journey. Click on to the next web page. There is no proof it will work. There are no “reliable” ratings.

I’ll speculate that humanity is indeed lost and directionless. While comfortable there is no compulsion to do anything whatsoever. We can sit on the sofa with our home delivered food clicking through hundreds of channels of shit on the TV and internet. Maybe we find something that piques our interest for the first series. We watch the second series knowing well that it will not be as good. Like a coke-head, the subsequent lines do not give the same hit. The novelty has worn off.

So what do we do? Maybe a little more retail therapy? Perhaps some more inane social media posts? Or we can eat drink and shag ourselves stupid. The NHS will clear up the mess…

———-

We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl, year after year

Running over the same old ground, what have we found?

Pink Floyd

————-

Marcus Aurelius Quotes

The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane.

If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.

Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.

You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.

Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.

Whenever you are about to find fault with someone, ask yourself the following question: What fault of mine most nearly resembles the one I am about to criticize?

When another blames you or hates you, or people voice similar criticisms, go to their souls, penetrate inside and see what sort of people they are. You will realize that there is no need to be racked with anxiety that they should hold any particular opinion about you.

How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.

The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit. The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are.

You are a little soul carrying about a corpse, as Epictetus used to say.

Do every act of your life as though it were the very last act of your life.

What we do now echoes in eternity.

Perfection of character is this: to live each day as if it were your last, without frenzy, without apathy, without pretence.

Nothing happens to anybody which he is not fitted by nature to bear.

Expansion of Consciousness and Letting Go

Before I get into this I will take a little diversion. It is to do with karmic “debt” which is another way of simply saying imbalance. If you take more than you give that is unbalanced and ultimately unsustainable. If we “wrong” someone we may feel guilty especially if we are socially caught in so doing, found out, reported to teacher. We may be socially required to say “sorry” even if we do not mean it. It does not change the “wrong” one iota. It is the sort of thing our mothers might require of us if we stole our sister’s Maltesers. It is a social “peace” keeping. It does not change the karma one tiny bit. Until such time we feel it in our hearts to be wrong, we will continue to accrue karmic debt from similar acts. Were the scales to fall from our eyes one fine day we might want to change our ways. We might re-orient our behaviour towards our fellow human beings, try to stop being selfish bellends and do some nice self-less stuff for a change. We would not do this for “show” or PR. Karma does not give a toss about PR. We can never undo a wrong we have meted out to someone nor can we “make it up to them”. What we can do is ensure that we do not inflict that behaviour on others.

Say for example you were to slag me off. You could never undo that. What you could do is make a general effort not to repeat this behaviour, not to inflict it on others. You could strive to be generally more positive and less derogatory. You could balance out your unpleasantness by being more pleasant generally. In so doing you would start to balance your books with the universe. There is no requirement to do anything in respect of me, rather a more general debt to the universe. I personally am unlikely to feel aggrieved or owed. So to try to make it up to me would be silly and probably disingenuous.

Here we have an example of a consciousness expanded away from the petty and personal to the wider and universal. At the moment it seems Trump takes everything personally and vindictively so. His focus is centered on him and does not have a wider universal view. It is all about his personality and his sense of self. He feels hard done by a lot of the time and is prone to playing angry victim.

This sense of victimhood is shared by vast tracts of humanity; they bemoan that life is unfair and complain that things are not as they should be. They imagine life a burden forced upon them. They try to have life on their own terms. If they don’t like how they look they will pay a plastic surgeon to surgically disfigure them. Their consciousness is not expanded beyond their perception of how the meat looks. They are fixated on something arguably silly.

In the blue books opus the Tibetan discusses initiation as a sequential expansion of consciousness, here diagrammatically represented.

In the diagram, the scale is reconfigured at the end of each open cone. The diameters represent the breadth of consciousness and width of inclusiveness. Each successive cone is an order of magnitude increase in breadth of consciousness. The scale is perhaps logarithmic.

According to the text the consciousness of a fifth degree initiate differs very markedly from your normal common or garden human. What might concern them is not the same as the house home heart wallet and genitals of normal people. Normal people worry about a host of mundane things which in the wider evolutionary scheme do not matter very much. Your much sought after promotion in job is of no consequence in terms of your spiritual evolution.

If you think of a snake as it grows and evolves it has a tendency to shed its skin so that it, no longer constrained, can grow. A similar view can be had here. As a person evolves the ways and thought patterns of the old life must be shed. Let go of. So that a newer nascent consciousness can expand unburdened by the habits {bad} of the past. The fresh new skin does not need the scaly old ways to constrain it. This letting go can mean relationships which drag you down or they can simply need recalibrating. Old habits die hard and these are the detritus that needs letting go of.

Being obsessed  with little trite details can prevent the expansion of consciousness. One needs to move from the petty and personal to more universal and joined up. To recognise there is but one life to which we all pertain.

To the would be initiate expansion of consciousness and spiritual evolution are the only goals of merit. They seek to rise above the mundane and not remain trapped in the mire which is often petty and of a deeply personal nature.

Letting go is vital in order to enable expansion of consciousness. Mental skin, rigid self-image must be shed again and again.

You cannot expand your consciousness by keeping the same view of the world you currently have. It acts as barrier to evolution, a ghetto wall which keeps you constrained.

Letting go is a truly vital component to the expansion of consciousness. Letting go vivifies.

Slapdash or Thorough?

With human nature being as it is if you offer someone an apparently low risk “quick” shortcut to just about any situation, they will take it in preference over a risky more long term perhaps considered path. In movies this shortcut mentality often leads people into dire situations which might have been avoided. In wanting the easy out they can fuck up and badly so. People avoid effort and application and can find themselves up the proverbial creek in a barbed wire canoe.

This tendency could be easily exploited. I know this well.

Most people bodge, cut corners and have a hasty slapdash mentality. Patience is as rare as a full refreshing fresh water lagoon on the Nullarbor plain in dry season. People like band aid fixes, an Elastoplast quick answer. One that gets a “problem” off the desk at least for the time being. Better still if they can palm the “problem” off onto someone else, make it an SEP. The greasy buck never stops.

The problem is that shoddy and slapdash can create more problems than it solves.

Today I have been cleaning out the sewerage drains to the cess pit. They have been problematic since we arrived. They are designed for old-school high cistern tsunami-flush systems not modern eco-cistern flushes. I tend to have to clean about twice a year and my plumber’s rods have paid for themselves in saved money many times over.

We could call it “Zen and the Art of Cleaning out the Shitter”.

The idea being that it is a job that needs done before my bionic hip.

Because my motion is increasingly spastic I could not perform one of the fiddly tasks to  get a rod around a partial U-bend. I tried and had to ask the wife to help. There was a choice to do a partial clean and maintenance or do a thorough job. She was able to do the fiddly bit and I was able to finish a thorough job. The rods, now washed, are drying on the drive.

I was less Zen today because of the awkwardness of my body and the pain in my hips.

Similarly the ceiling in the lounge could use another coat of paint at one end. We could leave it or I could do it tomorrow. The temptation to let standards drop is stronger because of my incapacity. We have already made a few compromises. They are realistic.  Time is running out a little.

I would like to have all the “heavy” tasks out of the way before they slice me up. I don’t know how incapacitated I will be nor for how long. There are some things that only I can do.

People can mistake being slapdash as being clever or cunning. Cleverness is not the same as wisdom which prefers a more thorough approach.

Wisdom can appear to take more time in the short term, but in the integral over all events, thoroughness is often a saver of time.

Slapdash people never get to see the experimental data which backs us this postulate {above}. They are hasty and prejudiced. They KNOW they are right.

Is Being Negative Clever?

This topic was raised in a dream last night.

Some imagine that being highly sceptical and picking holes in everything is the hallmark of intellect and perhaps cleverness. Please understand that when I use the word clever I do not do so in a positive sense. Clever for me is a derogatory term implying an arrogant perhaps smug self-satisfaction, a know-it-all misplaced glee. It is very easy to pick holes, much harder to mend them. I’ll suggest that it is a flaw of human sociopolitical mindset to be negative. To always find fault and thereby prove just how bad and terrible things are. It is a prejudice. A crowd, perhaps baying, will get behind a negative sentiment easily.

Back when I used to do personal and team development courses my favourite piece of personal feedback was, “Alan’s ability to constantly find positives in every situation was tiresome and irritating!” This was from young Ph.D. students at a Complexity doctoral training centre in UCL. Young people full of negativity are hard to motivate. Can’t is a self fulfilling prophecy. Eeyore is alive and tolerably well, not too bad, getting by, moping.

One of the things which has surprised me about France is just how negative people collectively are. They are inert, they complain and find fault. They are actually more negative than cynical Brits. They have shit loads of great technology which nobody outside of France buys. This is because they seem too shy and embarrassed, perhaps arrogant and lazy, to meanigfully address non Francophone markets. There is a cloud of negativity and little encouragement. The medical profession here lacks warmth and is process driven. It is very good but mostly soul less. Few understand my post hip operation career at the Bolshoi. Graveyard humour is lacking and as a result things can be dour and sullen.

In the dream last night I was talking with a British GP doctor. She was posh upper class and old school, roughly my age. She was tweedy and clearly had an intimate relationship with gin and tonic. You could imagine her on a pheasant shoot equipped with cognac filled hip flask. She was looking at all my extensive medical tests. On the basis of these she wanted to know why I had come to see her. I explained that I was concerned about getting a post cold chest infection. She said that I should not be such an idiot. All my tests showed that aside from my arthritis I am in a very good state of health for my age and considering my past consumption. She said that we was considering telling me to fuck off out of her office. I do not have COPD and my ticker works just find. I said that the constant pain puts a down lens on things. She said that in a half a year or so things would look more rosy. Cheer up!

It kind of highlights how the medical profession may send one off to be a lab rat and then forget to give you perspective. If you have 70 medical appointments in a year you will assume yourself to be severely ill, when you may not be. It shows how the big grey heavy mental cloud of negativity can drag you down suck out your spirit like a Potteresque dementor.  On Monday I stood in the “happy” queue at the pharmacy in the local village. Shiny happy people it was not.

“Sitting here eating my heart out baby, I need some hot stuff baby…” It was a shame that the radio was not on…

The world right now lacks direction, positive direction. It is a heavy and very negative space. Hope is a very rare thing just now. Division and negativity are the prevalent toxins.

Being overly negative is a very big downer…man…

Atonement – Ruining Lives

The other night we watched a quintessentially English film called “Atonement”. It was very well acted and full of luvvies. The costumes and setting were excellent. It was full of repression and class tension. The gist of it was that a posh teenage girl lied about events, a possible sexual assault. As a consequence a lower class man previously sponsored through Cambridge by the family was arrested and gaoled for the assault. The young woman of the house {the sister of the informant} and he were finally opening up about their strong feelings for each other just before the event. He, the outsider, was sent to prison in disgrace and their relationship was severed. The young woman of the house left the family. All because of the younger sister’s lies, the stretching of “truth” by the teenage girl who was too embarrassed to change her story. Before she got to atone for her sins, her older sister died in a Nazi bombing of London and he died during the BEF retreat to Dunkirk. The young informant wrote a whole novel imagining the lovers together and her atonement. It was all made up in her head, something she imagined doing but never could. It was too late. She did not atone. She imagined making up a “happiness” for them atoned for her actions. In reality it did not nor could not.

It shows that those fond of attention with a talkative tongue can invent shit and ruin the lives of others. Talk can literally derail lives. A few words in haste can have a devastatingly destructive impact. I am fairly sure that the basic gist of the story is played out time and again. The versions and circumstance vary, but lying for attention may be a very common theme. The film suggested that the protagonist who wrote a novel about the betrayal struggled with appreciating the impact and scale of what she did. Not everyone will struggle, the more sociopathic may feel justified and never think of it again. But if we are human we all kind of know when we have betrayed, let down and not been impeccable. Our conscience may vary. We may have a few nights on the pillow before sleep when the ghosts of deeds past parade before our mind. It may be more impactful and of a greater longevity.

It is often the outsider, the person who is not present, who has their lives ruined.

If we are so lucky as to be offered a chance to atone in some way for our deeds then the universe is kind to us. Should we fail to seize such a thing then our guilt may grow and metastasise. In reality we can never change nor undo the damage we have done. Any “sorry” if heartfelt is to assuage our own feelings of misdemeanour. Karmically it is at least an acknowledgement of responsibility and perhaps of learning. If we learn from misdemeanour then it has at least served some purpose. If we are a serial offender then pain and ruin has been wasted. It is wanton destruction.

It is logical that one lie almost invariably leads to others. Unless the truth is out, the lies propagate. The karma of lies can often be the perceived need for more lying, more falsehood. The causal impact of lies and exaggerations can be manifold.

A simple act can bifurcate through space-time.