“Post Mortem” Dream and Going Through the Motions – 25-02-2026

February 25, 2026 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

This morning I had a dreaming segment in which a now emeritus British academic came to inquire of me and my ideas concerning some cobbled together science project or other. She is/was a big cheese in UK science and is the sort of person who would get an obituary written. She asked multiple probing questions but avoided the subject as to why I decided to jack it all in way back. She was trying to ascertain if I had a scientific mind and was sane. The “interview” took place both at current time and twenty five years ago. She also interviewed my ex-wife in the earlier time frame. From the dream it was clear that our lives {ex-wife} were already divergent back then. The big cheese seemed to find that I was not actually insane and that my scientific thinking was OK. She was going to report back to some committee or other. Some review some post mortem as to what happened way back then.

Commentary

It is very typical in both scientific and political arenas to hold a “placatory review” in which an inquiry is launched and a report made, a white paper written. The aim of these charades is to calm things down and appease by giving the impression of actually doing something. Rarely does anything ever happen after these. The recommendations are noted and consigned to some cobweb filled archive waiting for for Lara Croft to find them several centuries hence. It is extremely rare for any such inquiry to err from the status quo. But it gives the impression of listening, caring and taking action. In fact these are just going through the motions, there is no intention or appetite to change anything.

The dream points at the fact that I have made several decisions which were largely unanticipated by others and about which sense making has been difficult for them. Most of these were handled very poorly because of a lack of interpersonal skills held by others. They were very “Basil Fawlty”.

“Don’t mention the war!!”

There is no point in holding a post mortem if there is no intention to do anything nor learn from events. It just gives a vague warm feeling of responding albeit long after the horse has bolted. It is by way of post hoc stable door closing. There is an illusion of doing something.

Dream Follow Up – 25-09-2025 – Basil Fawlty

September 25, 2025September 25, 2025 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

This morning we were in the local French supermarket. There was a Welsh couple there. {We can hear English language a mile off.} Instead of joining the short disabled and pregnant woman check out queue with us. They chose a much longer queue. In case they were challenged for not being spastic or pregnant enough. It was very British, avoid, avoid, don’t make a scene. {Whatever you do.}

I am pretty crippled and if we are challenged we could play the two-cancer joker card for the wife. We will trump you…

I checked up on my flat mate from this morning’s dream. He is now emeritus. His university reported a £30 million deficit last year over 10% of their total budget. It is possible that as part of euphemistic “re-structuring” his expensive subject area was curtailed and he was offered a “package”.

It reminded me of just how crap British people can be in “awkward” situations. When I left Imperial near two decades ago it was very poorly handled. Basil Fawlty and Manuel could have done a much better job. I don’t recall any goodbyes. Nobody gave a heartfelt “sorry to see you go”. Retrospectively it was shit, gauche and indicative of their poor interpersonal skills.

I was on an active research grant at the time. I never got to see the report write up on the grant even though I was named on it. When I mucked about on Research Gate a few years ago I found out that my name was on a published paper. One that I had never seen nor was I aware of. By magic I had written a research paper without knowing it. Elsewhere further commentary was made on me without my having sight of what was written. No doubt they justified this to themselves. I suspect they came up with a “reason” to avoid.

“Don’t mention the war. Don’t mention Alan!”

We watch “First Dates” and when asked at the end of the show if they would go on another date, the so-called heterosexual male in a trial couple often pleads “ladies first” and gets the woman to say yay or nay. This is not very masculine and has a pass the buck mentality. It makes me embarrassed that men behave like this. They should man up and take the risk.

People might be good scientists but they might be poor at being decent human beings. They may have no spine, little courage and lack a pair.

The theme of “making plans for Nigel” has once again reared its head in the dream. People imagine I might like something, might want something. They in their omniscience then forget to ask. They don’t ask me.

How could I possible not be on board with whatever cunning plan they have dreamed up? They after all know best.

“He is bound to like what we have schemed for him…”

Well maybe not…

If people want to behave like arses then it is their prerogative so to do…

Same shit different day, methinks…

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Raman Spectroscopy – Lost Marbles – Dream 02-08-2024

August 2, 2024 ~ quantumdreamer ~ Leave a comment

In no way did I think about any of these individuals during the day. I have not met any of them in person for nearly two decades and in two cases more than that.

I am in some kind of office / seminar room taking with AP. He wants to know why I am there. I say that I am following up on an ex-student of mine and how things are going with the Raman spectroscopy. Tony says that they have switched him to a rig with a CW laser of lower power which will mean longer acquisition time. I say he will just have to count for longer.

In walks DP, my Ph.D. supervisor. He seems a little anxious. He says that he would like to have a frank conversation with me. I say that I am fine with that. He comments that “they” thought I had completely lost the plot, lost my marbles and gone off the rails. I say that I always note that the collective noun for a group of academics is a gossip of academics.

He reiterates that they thought I was psychologically ill.

I say, “And you did nothing?”

He says that they were nervous and did not know how to handle the situation.

I say that that was a bit shit and demonstrated a very low level of courage and poor interpersonal skills. It was a bit pathetic and all Basil Fawlty.

He says that they thought I had gone a bit pikey.

I gesture with my right hand at my immaculate suit and shiny black leather shoes. I point at my oxford button down collar shirt and neat tie. I can see that this does not fit his perception.

I walk out of the room and head out of campus onto Exhibition Road. I light up a cigarette whilst at the edge of campus. A security guard admonishes me. I mentally give him the finger.

I walk down towards the tube and after I have finished the cigarette I walk into the foyer of the science museum.

There is a pair of light blue handled aluminium walking sticks available for use and I use these to help with my arthritis. As I walk deeper into the building I bang into RC. He clearly recognises me and searches for a name.

“Martin?”

“No, I was in you tutor group at UCL about 400 years ago.”

“Alan, how are you?”

He shakes my hand effusively and greets me warmly. I say that I am fine.

He thanks me for finding Barony Castle which they have used as a venue ever since. Just as they are renting space from the science museum now.

I move on into a library at the back. Still using the walking sticks only I am carrying one and using the other. As I walk into the library, I see LB hosting a seminar. She recognises me but does not acknowledge. I go to the back and then leave. As I am leaving, I brush past DK who does not recognise me until I am well past the now closed door.

Dream ends.