Over the last few days, I have been having problems with my osteo-arthritis. I saw the physio on Monday and as a result had pain. I am not yet taking medication. I have arthritis in both hips and my lower spine. There is also arthritis in my cervical spine with two herniated discs and a narrowing of the spinal canal. There is pressure on my spinal cord and from time to time my fingers are symptomatic from the hernias. I am worn out and my movement is rigid and slightly spastic. I cannot stand for long times.

As such I have a growing empathy for the character Wotan Wagner in the Ragnarök series here pictured with Thor or ᚦᚢᚱ.

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Intellectually I know that one day I too may need a mobility scooter. It is a moot point whether or not I cark it before then. I don’t sense longevity in me.

I am due to have a catch up call over the internet in a few days’ time and it is occurring to me that it will be very difficult to explain, to tell the story of what happened to me in the interceding years. Which version do I give?

How might I turn my recollections into a credible story?

If I do not omit huge chunks, will I come across as bat-shit crazy?

There are some things which I do not believe that I can convey to anyone.

I am not being arrogant here; I am making an honest assessment of impossibility.

Only one person in the world has much of an idea. I have never strung it all together before. Which pointed me at a possible vanity project, an autobiography.

I have a recapitulation chart 1964-2007 upstairs which might help.

Because of the eternal now, I have poor recollection of physical plane events which might be the substance of a regular autobiography. I have annotations of meditations and dreams but without checking with my wife I would struggle to piece things back together in the mundane world.

I don’t really have a narrative, an operational legend per se.

If someone asked me, I have no idea how I might account for my life…in toto.

Weird…