Unusual – Golden Calligraphy – Protector – Dream 05-11-2025

Here is this morning’s dream. It is deemed unusual not for content by for the realism and quality of the indoor decors. They are very life like and top-end.

The dream opens in an upper floor kitchen of a multi-story building. It is white luminous and a mixture of natural and electrical lighting. I am sat at a white sided kitchen island with a wooden top. The finish on the wood has a light reddish mostly brown hue. It has the quality of fine cabinet Walnut but isn’t that. It is a “redwood” of sorts. I am on a tall stool sat to the island. In front of me on the wood is a paper napkin whose quality is like finest linen. It has the feel of magician’s white gloves. As I watch an iridescent golden script, a calligraphy, appears. It is in no language I recognise. Yet I can understand the script phonetically to be “estaf” or “eraph”. I joke that it is Gloria Estefan and the Miamai Sound Machine. I hear in the dream an Estefan song followed by “Despacito” on solo Spanish guitar. I realise that the script is in fact Angelic script and that the “s” is silent phonetically therein. Thus the word is seraph of seraphim. I place the now silky-linen cloth in to my left hand shirt pocket after having inhaled it while lovingly holding it in both hands. It is close to my heart.

I am joined by the wife and one of her friends. The women is not one of her known friends. We are sitting in the kitchen which leads out onto an elevated decking balcony. The garden furniture is lovely as is the rest of the kitchen. They are drinking white wine from ultra-thin expensive wine glasses. I go out to smoke on the balcony and then join them back in the kitchen. I show the friend my cloth with the Angelic writing on.

The scene changes and the woman is joined on the balcony by her sister who lives nearby. They are discussing television programmes. I am now in a deep white bath on a raised pedestal in a state of the art bathroom. The bath has a sealing door for disabled access. The wife and her friend are sat in a window seat in the bathroom which has polished wooden flooring, sanded ultra smooth. I get out of the bath with a semi caused by the warm water and go to reach a nearby white towel. I am dripping wet. The friend is at first embarrassed. I say not to worry I am very happy being totally naked I have nothing to hide. This is natural. I take a towel and dry myself off.

The owners of the building are arriving at the  external staircase to the white “mansion” side. They are coming through the door. They are a couple and two young males, late adolescent. I have been tutoring the boys. We should not be here. I go down to meet them and say that I know we should not be here. We are leaving. I understand that they may no longer want me to teach the lads and that my contract is ended. If however on reflection they change their mind they have my number. They do not seem able to speak out of surprise. We file past them out of the building and into the street. My effusiveness has diffused the situation.

The scene changes and I am in the attic / penthouse of a multistorey city building, maybe half a dozen floors high. The feel is European and the roof is made of grey metal sheeting, maybe lead. It is an original feature hundreds of years old. I am with a number of people and thinking about jumping from the building to the one on the opposite side of the street. There are a number of people there. I say that it is safe for me because I have my protector(s). I gesture out of the window to a man-like being hunched up like a bird sitting perched on the guttering. He has black slicked back hair and olive skin. He is juggling with many balls slightly smaller than a cricket ball. They are multi-coloured. There are blue, yellow, red and golden balls. Each ball is a little like a snooker one in weight. They have an iridescence. He throws balls across the gap between the building and they bounce back. He catches them. We look down and see people and cars in the street below. It is a European capital.

The scene changes and I am in right hand drive VW minibus / camper ban. It is being driven by a large English woman with long hair. She is a bit jolly hockey sticks librarian. We are winding around near single files streets in a village perched high. I joke it is Highgate. I say to take it easy the locals are accustomed to the streets she not. We are looking for a parking place outside the white mansion from before. There are none. I suggest we drive past. We do and then have to make a U turn. She pulls up in  a cliff top viewing point. There is no safety rail. The “car park” goes off the cliff. She parks and I pull the hand brake up an extra notch for safety.  She is very nervous. Below us we can see the city panorama amidst green covered peaks and with little white fluffy clouds. We are thousands of metres up and the city is below us. It looks a bit like Rio de Janeiro from the air. I suggest we get out the van and walk back to the building.

The dream ends and I note it as a change in dreaming, it is unusual.

Alms Bowl Mentality – pārasaṃgate – nagal Woman dream 07-10-2025

It is full moon.

Yesterday I was very upset close to the point of outrage that someone could cancel an appointment I made, without asking me. And that the imaging centre would accept someone else cancelling an appointment I made without checking first with me. The fact that I received an electronic confirmation of appointment on Friday afternoon and then to arrive on Monday morning to be told there is no appointment is beyond the pale. It is piss poor and shoddy. Outrageous even. Very un-impeccable. I struggled to park it before trying to sleep.

Last night I had an intuition about how to phrase my orientation to life and it was “alms bowl mentality”. In that I am generally happy with what life and the universe offers me. I am not acquisitional or greedy. I am not about self-advancement nor gaining apparent kudos from others in a socio-political sense. This means that I lack the social ambition for “success” in academia and the common world. I am not hard wired nor bought in to the metrics. I do not seek power or position.

I have a look to see what is in my alms bowl and that usually suffices. In a way it makes sense with my prior putative reincarnations.

I nodded off.

I awoke at around 3:15 AM and struggled to go back to sleep because my mind was filled with the ridiculousness of what happened during the day. I struggled to believe that it could actually happen. I realised that I am somehow having to try to transmute this before the next alleged appointment if indeed it is to take place. I know myself well enough to suspect that I might manifest at my most monosyllabic and ultra logical picky if I do not transmute. People will know something is off. I could easily turn into viva-prof questioning mode.

Because I was having trouble parking the notion I decide to practice a full “phowa” consciousness withdrawing and death meditation. To keep my hand in should it be needed if things continue to go wrong. This is a rehearsal for withdrawing the life thread from the physical vehicle. So I began with silent chanting:

gate gate pāragate pārasaṃgate bodhi svāhā

This is the going beyond mantram. Pretty soon I was deep in meditation. I was able to construct the thought forms relatively easy and built the consciousness and images I associate with inter alia Amitabha and Ganesh. I know the Ganesh is the destination for me.

The meditation energised me.

After a while I noted the visual field beginning to fill with my dreaming colour. I relaxed into the dreaming colour to see what it might have to offer.

The dream starts in a mansion / training facility conference centre nearby a single track railway. It is in the country but proximal to civilisation. The course is winding up. I have been the key facilitator. The course has been held such that each break out room corresponded to one of the four directions in the rule of the four pronged nagal. Needless to say the personnel in each room are flavoured by the direction and dressed accordingly. I take a young man down to the station in a motor cycle with side car. He and I have known each other long and he must go off ahead.

Back in the centre the course is winding up. The East room is tidy. In the plenary are gathered several of the participants. I do not understand why I am seeing the rule of the four, it is a quirk. The general feel is upbeat.

In the corner of the plenary on a wooden easel is a framed portrait of a woman. The frame is wide and ornate and the picture is at an angle. The woman in the picture is slightly younger than me, corpulent and is painted as an ~18th century portrait. Her name is written on a plaque. I recall and remember the name.

Sat quietly in the corner of the room is a woman who matches the portrait. She is in an unremarkable pastel yellow dress with light brown hair and untanned complexion. I walk over to her and say that I suppose that we should talk. I hold out my right hand to take her left hand in mine. We are both a bit apprehensive. I can see that she has a wedding and engagement ring on her hand. She is married. Her hand is tiny and older than her face. The moment I take her hand in mine I can feel her heart and am aware that she can feel mine. She says that the feeling is nearly too much. I agree.

I can feel my heart opening very wide and ultra-vulnerable. It still feels like that now as I type. I know that she is nagal woman. In that instant I can no longer recall the features of the other attendees. All I can see is her. I know that were we to meet in real life the recognition would be strong.

I am a little blown away at the unexpected nature of this. In the dream I am reminded of something I said to the wife following her incurable Myeloma diagnosis, “It is the warrior’s path anything can happen!!”

It seems in the dream that there might now be an “after” following an operation.

I wake up and it is around 6 AM.

It Is a Long Way from Kansas – Cardiology

The world is pretty fucked up right now. When the butcher of Khan Yunis is nominating B2- “Obliteration”- Boi Trump for a Nobel Peace Prize things are more than a little topsy-turvy. This is perhaps a new(ish) if twisted reality for our times. If you remember Franco, Mussolini at al., the unpleasant people, once formed a bad-boys club before and that turned out well…

The world is heading into a very nasty phase. Brutality is holding dominion over compassion and humanity. Rife me-first separatism is being propagated, decency {and common sense} is subdued by the practice of domination, coercion and forced submission. The disproportionate exercise of power is once more in flow. Waving cocks is once again sadly de rigueur.

It is along way from any idyllic Kansas of ere.

Today I get to find out if I have a heart amid all the high iron rust in my arteries and veins. They will probably plug me into the mains and look for traces of Fe2O3 in the pre-operative electrocardiogram. They may look for signs of a still pulsing muscle with an ultrasound device.

By the 18th of July I will have had 13 medical appointments in a little under three weeks. I will have given blood, had a CT and separate radionuclide scan {bonus CT also included}, a colonoscopy and test for sleep apnoea. I will have seen GP, implant dentist and consultant orthopaedic surgeons, a cardiologist, an osteopath, a rheumatologist and a lung specialist. That is a fair clustering of appointments. My dance card has been and is still full. In August I get to see a urologist for an update on my high prostate specific antigen levels. The next line of attack after the high res MRI I already have had is a prostate biopsy. Yippee!!! That will be fun. You can see from the look on my face above when they try to put a finger on it.

And on the TV in the news we get to see a stage managed travesty as mentioned in the first paragraph…

Are we really in this parallel universe. How the hell did we as a humanity get to this low low place. How much lower must we sink?? When this sort of thing seems quasi-normal?

This stinks, it smells real bad…

Dreams Around a Death 01-08-2011

I am in Africa with Théun. We are dressed in khaki shorts, with boots and khaki hunting vests. We are walking in a river and he is showing me some aspects of hunting {stalking}. As we walk along, we catch various fish which we discard. We near a rockpool which is where we are going to fish. The river goes between a rock formation and he wants to show me what is past that. So, we go through and right up to the lip of a waterfall which is there. The water cascades over into a massive plunge pool it is totally beautiful. I am a little nervous about the height but cope OK. As we pull back from the edge, I lift up the river bed as if looking under a carpet or rug. Under the river I can see night stars and sky. I replace the river bed and we move back to the fishing spot.

Later we are inside a room. In front of us on a table is a giant human heart which is still pulsing. I start to run a grater come mandolin over the heart. This removes aged, vitrified muscle so that the heart can function better. He looks on and there is a sense of us working on this together.

On the night 4 – 5th of September a Le Creuset casserole spontaneously split asunder in our kitchen in Surrey

22nd October 2011

I am somehow at a hotel resort over looking vast dunes. I notice Théun walking there he is very old and frail. He is walking. I ask him if he would like to talk. Not now. He turns and walks away. I think to myself whatever. He seemed a bit like a ghost.

Later in the same dream.

Theun is now paddling in the sea. I see him from a distance getting into trouble. He is having difficulty breathing. I am with E and I ask her what is needed. It is my Ventolin. I rush to the scene with my Ventolin. When I get there, he is being given CPR. I go to the hospital and am sat there beside him feeling his veins whilst they sort out a drip. The vein is “metallic” and I know that I am bringing him comfort. He passes away. There is a no resuscitation policy in place. It is clear to me that he is in a mess physically. I do not know why I was there” at the end.

I was not in contact with Théun at this time and the dream prompted me to do an internet search.

His death is reported at being on the 5th of September.