No! I do not want to download your effing app!

I have been pondering a notion, a question. It is this, “is it enlightenment or old age?”

Many of the things that people seem bothered about such as ‘phones, clothing, hairstyle, general appearance, apps, shagging, ‘phones, career advancement, kudos and internet fwiends don’t hold any fascination for me.

Now is this because of all my meditation that I have seen them to be impermanent and thereby illusory?

Or is it that just like any old git, I have experimental life evidence that these things ain’t all that?

Buggered if I know…

Recently I have been on the receiving end of my first bit of internet banking fraud. I do not use open networks in public spaces, nor do I visit and pay at dodgy web sites. Nevertheless some bastard has been able to pay for Uber in Amsterdam and Food Panda in Karachi of all places.

Given the location here in the wilds of Brittany I doubt anyone has had a bank card reader on an auto bank. There is just not enough footfall.

The signal from our Wi-Fi router does not reach off the property and unless someone has spliced into the fibre optic cable our internet has the low-level security of distance and isolation. We do not “surf” in public nor at Byron Bay. Of course some “actor” with skill could access our traffic. Because it is boring and not commercial I doubt anyone can be properly arsed. I haven’t yet fitted quantum key encryption.

There has been a data breach somewhere else…

We tend not to answer the ‘phone. Any attempt at ‘phone coercions would be met with English and not French. Random callers are ignored. If a French  ‘phone scammer was able to persuade me in English, they would have probably earned a few quid. I used to keep the Jehovah’s Witnesses busy for hours discussing comparative theology and world philosophy. With a smile. They even used to “blood” new recruits because they knew I had no ill will.

The bank have replaced my card but set its ability to purchase on line to zero euros as a safety measure. For some reason they want me to use the mobile app to put this right. I only turn on my mobile when I am going out to the physio or the shops alone. A battery charge usually last several months! So why would I want to use a mobile app?

This seems to be the answer for everything  down load our mobile app tear you hair out and have a myocardial infarction…

OK as a ’64 child I am still technically a boomer. But hey I used the internet back in the mid-late eighties.

In the hitchhiker’s guide the answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything is obviously download our mobile app…

Obvs…

Simple…

No! I do not want to download your effing app!!

Clearly, I have just answered my own question. I must be an enlightened being because I no longer salaciously obsess about juicy smartphone apps.

There is no need to reincarnate to feed off/at the Google and Apple stores.

Final liberation is mine. I am a free being…

The Proud Disconnect

I have long noted that I do not seem to have the same “stars in my eyes” that others might do about fame, kudos and positions of sociopolitical power. Because I have not shown the deference deemed owed by some, I have put noses out of joint and have experienced payback. I am unskilled in the art of sycophancy and brown nosing. Luckily my lack of said interpersonal skill is not tested these days. I can see that there is often a social-disconnect in which people are expecting some kind of different behaviour from me. I do not play the mutual itchy-back game well. As a young man and researcher I was academically precocious and unfiltered towards my “older and betters”. It was not a friend winner nor was it politically astute. To this day I am unlikely to doff my cap correctly were such behaviour deemed warranted. I don’t seek kudos nor do I deem it important. It is impermanent and thereby illusory.

I have always had the notion that I am a little alien to this planet. Others differ in outlook, I think.

My first celeb crush was on Delenn…

The biggest disconnect which I seem to have with society at large comes with this weird word “proud”.

Contestants on Masterchef Australia want to make their family proud and are proud of their creations. Coaches are proud of what their teams do in Rugby and Soccer. Parents are proud of their offspring and their achievements. People are proud if little Johhny gets into Oxford or Marie-Claire the Sorbonne. People can be proud they went to a Cambridge College or to Imperial. They can be proud that they finished a marathon or that they quit crack cocaine. They can be proud that they helped an old lady cross the road. People on SAS Celebrities can be proud of the effort they put in. Everybody wants to be proud of something, its seems. A lot of gay people are proud and have pride.

I just don’t get it…it is not a word that I would use.

In the past I got a degree and a Ph.D. Going into the viva for the latter, I was very well prepared. My thesis was a good journeyman effort with published results. Nothing earth shattering. My assessment was that I would pass. This proved true. It was as I had assessed. No biggie. Job done, next thing. I wasn’t proud of it. Though to keep the peace I had to sit for hours in the Royal Albert Hall for the purposes of ritual magic. I was not proud, my realtives might have been. I thought the Ph.D. simply consistent with effort. I did not believe I deserved it. I believed I had satisfied the criteria. It was normal.

One of the things I have is the question, “is it possible”. This question when answered in either sense is usually enough for me. I asked myself recently, “is it possible to get a quantum optics patent granted without the use of a patent attorney and having done no university level science for well over a decade?” The answer was yes. My curiosity is satisfied. I am not bothered about winning.

Were I to go on Masterchef {UK if they allow men of my age and size } I would probably prepare very meticulously. The question would be, “could I make some food that experts thought was tidy?” If the answer was yes, I would probably lose interest. To take it to conclusion and make myself “proud” would not occur.

I do not recall anyone other than my nan saying she was proud of me. If you say it over and over, proud is such a weird word.

I have in general been happy. If I have done my impeccable best at anything that is enough irrespective of level of success measured or otherwise. Why would anyone be proud about putting a good effort in? It makes no sense to me. Isn’t a good effort the default?  

I have not got a trophy cabinet…I don’t need affirmation.

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As a little exercise listen carefully and note how many times the word proud is said in your earshot over the next few weeks or so…

Will you be proud of how many time you note the use of the word proud?

How long before you give up?

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Something Which You Later Rely On

Postulate: There is a growing tendency for a whole bunch of people to have a profound sense of entitlement and to take very many things and people for granted. They somehow deserve this inexhaustible bounty, it is their due to which they are entitled, owed even.

In the UK the police have powers of arrest and search subsequent to cursory inquiry. These powers for stop and search were misused historically. As a white now 60 year old male with a “posh” voice and good manners, it is unlikely that I will have any run ins with UK police, were I there in that country. I would not hear the following.

“You do not have to say anything. But, it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court. Anything you do say may be given in evidence.”

I have, when younger, had interactions with the police, several of which might have resulted in at least a night in the cells maybe more. Because I was civil, even when well off my face, I was not detained nor beaten up. I could say that I was lucky. My mother used to say that I can be charming. I am white, not brown, I wear no religious trappings, and my face is not covered in tattoos. Although I did not rely on it, my relative privilege helped me out. Here in France, I could not rely upon the command of English and UK based savoir faire.

The gendarmerie make checks here from time to time on cars. On one such occasion we were flagged over in our right hand drive Peugeot which the wife was driving. The officer came to my window, the normal one for a driver here. I showed him my carte de Sejour and French driver’s license and we were on our way. Odd.

I am more wary of the police here, because they are armed and there is a communication barrier. They do shoot “criminals” or “terrorists” here promptly and there is little public outcry. I have found that the French do not respond well to being challenged or disagreed with. They tend to react, then think. So, I would be ultra-cautious.

I am conscious as an immigrant that my right to remain is conditional and could be easily revoked. Consequently, we are very comprehensive in meeting our legal and tax obligations. We keep “kilograms” of justificatory paperwork, a marathon paper trail. Our right to stay card expires a year today. We have heard nothing about how to renew our “right” which was granted under the “Brexit” withdrawal “agreement”. A shift to the political right here could change everything. We could get booted out.

So, we have booked a short trip to Jersey to feel how we might feel to be surrounded by English speakers for the first time in six years. I am not relying on a renewal. We have a loose contingency which involves a move to a cheap part of the UK. Given our health challenges neither of us take health for granted because we do not have good health.

At the moment Trump is alienating people around the globe, feeling entitled so to do and perhaps taking for granted that others will continue to suck up. He is not a purveyor of goodwill. There may be irreparable damage to relationships ongoing. I am not sure he has thought things through fully, if he has, he does not care. I think it likely he is being reactionary and still resentful of anything Biden related. He may estimate that his “allies” in terms of nations, will always be there.

He is exhibiting a sense of entitlement. He perhaps thinks that the USA is entitled to Panama, Greenland and Gaza sur mer. The USA is entitled to preferential trade terms even though their livestock are riddled with anti-biotics.

In this he is mirroring much for humanity at large. He mirrors a ME-first orientation, expressed as US or USA first.

In the past I know that I have helped people and been of use to them. I did this in a non-transactional manner, for free if you like. There was no game of itchy backs. I’ll speculate that I have been taken for granted on numerous occasions. I don’t feel upset by this but I have noted a marked surprise when I have disappeared and could no longer be relied upon. The grant, if you like, has been withdrawn. People can be complacent that the things or people they take for granted will always be there.

The universe is impermanent and people can fail to appreciate the loan of gift which it temporarily confers.

I am aware of a supposition here in that the medics are working to a French life expectancy of ~83-4 for me, whereas my gut feel is that I will in no way last that long. If I say this out loud it might get a strange “reassuring” response / reaction. This life expectancy is to an extent taken for granted and people even plan to it.

People can think that they are owed a long life, that they have all the time in the world. However, the sands in the egg timer do run out. When someone dies “young” the newspapers report it as a “tragedy” that they were “taken from us” prematurely. They wail and wring hands. Death is an entirely natural process. There is no tragedy. Many die with regrets about things which they could or might have done but failed to do, perhaps because they lacked courage. They might live in the land of “if only”.

People above all take alloted time for granted and as a consequence they squander and waste it. One day tomorrow never comes. It is then too late.

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Do you think that the universe owes you?

Are you getting all that you are entitled to and deserve?

Are you hard-done by?

Is life not fair?

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