The dreaming symbol of hair is social-self-image. The dream previous is the second one pointing at getting a haircut, popping out to get some money and the number 10. The earlier one in mid-September was set in a swish posh boutique in London, the one today more local. Before Covid I did get my haircut at a male barber in Guingamp. I have not been back since.

Having a haircut implies some kind of change in my social self-image. Tidying it up?

I am not at all concerned about my appearance and would perhaps look downmarket, even quasi-redneck to those who once knew me. About every 5-6 weeks or so the wife gives me a buzzcut at home. I have not combed my hair in over decade. When it is short there is no need. I live in army combat trousers, t-shirts and in winter a jumper.

In Buddhism hair can be called “ignorance grass” which you shave when you enter as a novice.

Outside of this marriage the only people I talk in any way socially to are the man who comes to cut the grass on the sit-on mower and the physiotherapist.  These are at most often bi-weekly and short.

I think of myself as physically strong for my age but struggle with flexibility and arthritis. I am not yet taking regular pain medication. I have seen a surgeon for him to assess if/when I need replacement hips. He was the man who put the Titanium pin in the head of my femur so that I could walk again after it bust. The wear and tear will only increase. I am pretty physically crocked. The ONS seems to think that on average there is ~50% chance that I will make 85. I disagree. That seems an awfully long time, luckily, I smoked and drank.

Primarily I see myself as a retired man, who has difficulty walking for a long time/distance who lives in a big house, with a big garden on a pension below that of the French minimum wage. I am married and by all “normal” metrics socially isolated. That does not bug me one inch.

In terms of likelihood, I will probably not do anything vaguely related to science again. Although I have read widely and perhaps have some knowledge, that is not much use to me and virtually nobody else is interested. My opinion is that what I know has no monetary value.

I have no idea how people see me. I am certainly not well known. Aside from the physiotherapist the people who have interacted with me the most in the last five or so years are the district nurses who care for the wife. They know a little about where and what I got up to two decades ago.

Socially I see myself as someone who does not like to interact and the usual social chit chat about the weather and how terrible the world is, is not my cup of tea. I used to hate finger-buffet death by canapé events.  I am pretty sure that my dislike of “normal” social interaction was a negative factor back when I was still in the world. It detrimentally affected my progression. But that is all by the by and nothing can be done to change the past.

I don’t see myself as someone that people might seek out or want to speak with. I don’t perceive myself as being welcome in certain circles. If I have anything left to offer it is not generally sought. I certainly am not going to big myself up or inflict myself on anyone. My life is sparse and most likely to remain that way or get even more sparse.

I guess that I don’t match expectations. There may be people who have an image of how I should be, how I should look. Who knows.

I am a little puzzled as to why my dreamer has highlighted social self-image because I don’t really have a use for one. I can easily be just another anonymous customer in the supermarket. The village pharmacy has closed down, they knew me a little in there. We now go to pharmacies in bigger towns.

We have has a loose Christmas drinks invite from the garden guy. He is all over the place and I am not convinced of materialisation. I am not sure I would want to go in any case.

Hmnn….

That is a rough go at describing my social self-image. Let’s see if there are more dreams on the subject…

Weird…